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Hipsters are misguided adolescent minded people who live in a deluded fantasy land to promote their self-absorbed brand of pretentious alternativism. They act and dress alternatively so that they can illicit the perception from those around them that they are 'alternate' in every way.
The hipster’s train of thought is they want everybody to know that they’re different and they peacock this persona to fulfil its maximum potential. It’s egocentrism in its most disturbing manifestation; their entire focus is to have all eyes on them by any means necessary other than their own individualism and sense of self. The ultimate irony of the hipster is they seek the idealistic goal of complete individualistic freedom, yet they attempt to achieve this through mass conformity and a dogmatic stance on what this ‘non conformity’ should be and how its represented. It is the complete inversion to the ‘sense of self’ that free thinking human beings strive for as the 'individual' is rejected for the badge, banner and title of ‘hipster’, be it literal or figurative.
Hipster's thought process: ‘judge me not for what I am, but judge me for what im trying to convey’
Wears band shirts of bands they probably don't even listen to, (namely Nirvana) worships Kurt Cobain and, lives off of Nutella, Cheetos and sour patch kids.
All the hipsters on tumblr that post photos of their Nutella and tries to pass them off as photography.
Hipsters can be easily identified by their excessively portrayed personalities and attitudes of being "too cool for life," as well as their belief that they are "cooler" than others, all of whom in their eyes who follow trends/the mainstream (which is somehow not the same as hipsters following the hipster trend). 97% of all hipsters are hypocrites.
Hipsterism is highly contagious and can quickly spread to others if there is a high volume of hipsters present. Thus, if you live in an area with a high density of hipsters, the stores, restaurants, etc. will tend to reflect their tastes/lifestyle. Interestingly, despite being the trendiest of trends, neighborhoods that have suffered from hipsterism have generally increased in property value.
Hipsters frequently dress in the same general manner, despite describing that manner has being unique/individual. This usually includes vintage clothing, clothing from thrift stores, ironic clothing, plaid, tight pants, metro-sexual clothing, clothing meant to appear ragged/poor (despite it's wearer being middle to upper-middle class and receiving all their money from wealthy parents in the form of an allowance, rather than working/living in reality), etc. They may also wear unnecessary accessories such as scarves during the summer, sunglasses indoors, etc.
Hipsters are also associated with indie music, contemporary art, etc. Unfortunately, their attempts to turn away from the mainstream and "kitsch" to a more bohemian-like lifestyle has ruined much of what they now claim as theirs (ie: indie music is now dominated by a scene and has little to do with the actual music, contemporary art is plagued with over dramatic plays and poor work/weak conceptual ideas, coffee shop atmospheres are ruined by their judgmental attitude towards all non-hipsters, etc.) In essence, the things they helped to build have lost all value and meaning, but that is appropriate to the apathetic, lack of originality that is possessed by all hipsters.
Knowing the truth about what they are, most hipsters will deny that they are a hipster. However, it should be noted, there are some people who fit the hipster description and are legitimate in their interests, activities, and lifestyle, but this is extremely rare.
Despite their likely denials of being a hipster, and a belief in rugged individuality (which has turned into a conformity apart from "mainstream conformity"), to be a hipster, one must win the approval of other hipsters. Thus, it is impossible for a naturally "non-coo" person to ever achieve hipster status. This of course, is yet another contradiction. Over all, hipsters lead a judgmental, elitist lifestyle, as aforementioned, with a strong conviction in the belief that they are "cooler than life."
For some reason, hipsters like Pabst Blue Ribbon, possibly one of the worst, most watered-down beers available... Apparently it's cool to have bad taste, an important detail to remember for any aspiring hipster.
If one is at all unsure of whether a person is in fact a hipster, the yuppie/douche test never fails. If the person comes across in any way as a pretentious, hypocritical, yuppie douche, they are probably a hipster.
An example of where to find hipsters:
Wicker Park/Bucktown, Chicago
Modern day hipsters are the counter-culture product of a belly full consuming materialistic society. We have no real social or political issues to revolt against; so they choose to revolt against the mainstream pop culture. *1* And with what again? Even more materialism and consumerism. *2*
Hipsters will enjoy a bunch of uninteresting "boring" things in an attempt to spite what they assume to be "sheeple". They turn neutral, once respected things into ridiculous holier than thou interests. Extreme examples turns into hilarity. *3* They will eventually suck the life out of anything that was once neutral.
A hipster is just as conforming as anybody, but then again, what part of youth isn't? Hipsters are no different than any other youth, Because take out the surface differences, the main reasons for such behavior is same as any; sex, vanity, social status, and substance abuse. Original "values" such as the pseudo "liberal independent thinking" have been destroyed by the vain parasites of the subculture. Stop fooling yourselves, there is nothing free thinking about (...) ; admit you like this band because it's indie (Not because it's original or "smart"), or wear this type of clothing just because nobody else does. Probably to look chic to others, ay? *4*
Like whatever pleases you; friendships are formed, not screened through like job applications.
1* Hipsters are a evolved version of resentment and social stigma. It's evolved however, so much; modern day hipsters are now a entirely new subculture of their own, Complete with specific trends and rules.
2* for example: Pop music, specific current fashions like mall clothing, etc are looked down upon as conformity. To "fight" such atrocities; hipsters desperately cling to their own trends, such as listening to extremely obscure music and buying only from specific labels.
3* *Hipster: "Yeah, I really enjoy (insert band)"
Someone: "You know... (insert band) promotes A LOT of (insert obvious human rights violations)...
Hipster: "Like you'd know! You just don't understand the complexity of them! You're just another close minded arrogant MTV loving conformist!"
**Most hipsters don't care to actually read real books; however since reading, philosophy, politics, what not is so "uncool" it's automatically a pseudo-interests, because the people who dislike such things are SUCH conforming robots of society!
4* The same things happen, random people hook up, people get their pictures taken by whatever paparazzi, we see if we recognize so and so who we heard some gossip about and look; there's some booze.
Q: Why do hipsters suck at karate?
A: Because a hipster can't get past the white belt!
Superficial substance. Trying to be the ultimate 'cool and original' person. Backwash individuals who lack complete personality, having the need to grasp onto vintage or unique items: clothing, accessories, music, etc. Having an unusual name can help.
"These totally unattractive sunglasses will surely be popular."
"How exciting, plaid is my favorite color."
"Balderdash, I've always wanted to be an orphan."
One who wears skinny jeans, listens to indy and is born with the name Craig Martin.
Any one as hip as Craig Martin.
"I'm not a hipster, I just like bands that are so unheard of they don't even exist yet."