Random
Source Code
Random
Jesus H. Christ is a mythological character stemming from Christian lore. The "H" in the middle of the names is believed to stand for a number of things, ranging from "Holy" to "Harold," However, recent evidence suggests that the "H" actually stands for "HeySeuss." This story book character's middle name was inserted recently in order to pay homage to the greatest children's story teller of all time: Dr. Seuss. While the movement started as something of a cult tradition, it quickly made its way into pop culture, even appearing on the silver screen from time to time as a profanity. This is of course wildly inappropriate to true followers as it is disrespectful to take the good Doctor'said name in vain. As a happy coincidence of this fan-fabricated name, the Hispanic pronunciation of the first name is also taught upon reading the middle name.
God: Do you mind if I name my child after you?
Dr. Seuss: It would be an honor.
God: He shall be called Jesus HeySuess Christ.
Dr. Seuss: Jesus H. Christ, a fine name for a main character.
22👍 8👎
An exclamation you say when someone you depended on totally screws something up or you're faced with something that obviously just f*cked up your plans.
My sister to her husband-
"Jesus Christ in a Box, Michael! I said get the Playtex Supers in cardboard Tampons!... grrr Damnit!..."
10👍 3👎
Shortened version of the full name Jesus Hitler Christ.
"I don't know man, Jesus Hitler Christ sounds weird."
"So just go with Jesus H. Christ?"
"Yeah"
7👍 2👎
Christ on a Bike, but in Spades.
(But only used as an epithet of outrage and frustration)
"Christ on a fucking bike."
(Accompanied with pen being physically hurled across the desk)
"This idiot's complaining the report's 'different from' the last time they ran it. What do they do when they get a bank statement? Ring up Barclays' and say 'this statement's different from the one you sent me last June?"
39👍 24👎
Christian group that goes by "Cru" on most college campuses that talks about Jesus a lot. Mostly chill group of people who believe in God & hang out together.
They believe that God created us, He loves us, and He wants what is best for us, but that we can never be perfect like God because we screw up, make mistakes, hurt others, and are selfish - wanting what we want instead of what God wants. They belive that since God knew that even our best efforts of being perfect wouldn't even come close, He chose to send Jesus to bridge the gap between us and God, by dying in our place, taking the punishment that we deserved, and forgiving us for all of the crappy things that we are guilty of. So they believe they & everyone else can have a relationship with God if they simply ask for forgiveness & believe that He saved us.
Person 1: Yo, are you going to that Fall Retreat that Campus Crusade for Christ is doing?
Person 2: Nah, why whould I want to do that? Religious people freak me out.
Person 1: Yeah, me too actually. But we're going water skiing, kayaking, playing ultimate frisbee, and talking about how Jesus thought religion was lame because it was all about people trying to be good enough for God.
Person 2: I thought Jesus was all about religion?
Person 1: Nah. He wanted us to know God apart from religion, and that's what Campus Crusade for Christ is all about.
Person 2: Hmm. That's kinda strange, but if you're going, I guess I'll come check it out.
77👍 53👎
noun;adjective:
a term used when something is incredibly fucking supprising or when some one or something is:
A.Fucking Retarded
B.Smells like shit
C. or is stoned OFF THEIR ASSES, rolling, or tripping and did or said something incredibly memorable, rediculous, funny, smart.ect.
"Jesus shitting christ! I´m tripping so hard, that i saw the tree from Pochahontas!"
"Jesus shitting christ! did you eat a fucking corpse?"
"Britney was really a virgin all that time? Jesus shitting christ."
26👍 14👎
Used as an outburst of anger or frustration, or as an exclamation. Often used to refer to weed, or the weather.
Mr. Wiggles takes a huge hit of marijuana and then is unable to hold in the smoke, coughing and choking.
He would say afterwards, "Christ on a fucking cracker!" referring to the smoke.
or
Mr. Wiggles steps outside to get a breath of fresh air.
He would say, "Christ on a fucking cracker it's cold out!"
26👍 15👎