Manwich Table

A table at which you eat manwich, play board games, and put innocent young children in chokeholds, often resulting in them kicking your knees.

Y’all wanna go sit at the manwich table?

table-legged

The act of attempting to level a wobbly table that has one leg shorter than the others. Usually resulting in reducing a dinner table to the height of a coffee table.

I just table-legged my haircut, (by trying to even out the ends).

table trash

Sluts found at pool halls. Asks you to teach her to play pool so you can bend her over the table. Constantly strokes the pool stick mimicking a bad handjob.

The pool table is surrounded by table trash.

Flip the table

It’s 6pm on a Saturday. Your mans is late to pick you up for the date that you are finally going on after a year and a half in the “talking” stage. You look out the window pondering life. You realize that he has arrived. As you are driving to the bar for your date Chad tells you that he thinks he may be interested in seeing Nicole after you two are done seeing one another. You’re mad…so mad. So you yell at the driver to pull it over. You get out of the car but you get back in. You and the driver get together then and there. You get married to the driver who is secretly Jeff Bezos.

Chad ends up in jail for laundering money. That is called flipping the table.

Trina totally is going to flip the table on Josh when she gets the promotion.

Table Slap

The contact of hand and table that makes a loud clap noise. It can be used to show the new kid at school where to sit (especially if you wish for them to sit next to you).

Person 1 "The table slap is the reason I have friends"
Person 2 "I'll slap that table when I see it next"

table ski

Table skiing is the act of snorting two lines of cocaine in quick succession

Hey dawg I got 4 lines, we can both table ski and take shots.

Table Lice

The young, usually white, girls who hang out next to the rope in a nightclub's VIP section waiting to be summoned to the table of a gentleman with bottle service. Usually identified by their H&M knock-offs of Herve Leger bandage dresses, these girls are quick to drink your liquor and leave when you run out of vodka. Their retreat is usually marked by loss of cell phone, tears, and walking away barefoot holding Steve Madden heels in their hands. The normal migration home includes vomiting in the back of an Uber or catching the very last train to Suffolk/Nassau/Westchester County or New Jersey.

John: Man, I'm glad we got a table tonight.
Greg: Yeah me too, the table lice are actually pretty strong here. Let's grab that group of three on the edge of the rope over there.