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Having a wank before heading out on the town to avoid turning up in 'rape mode'.
Ed: How come Dave's behaving himself tonight? He hasn't tried to finger any of those birds yet and he's been stood near them for nearly a minute?
Steve: He had a tactical wank mate.
Ed: Good call, he might see out the night.
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(noun) - 1. a cloth, handkerchief or strong tissue that is used to masturbate into (possibly numerous times) for easy and convenient spunk-disposal. Can often be preceded by the word 'the' to denote emotional attachment.
2. A creative insult for someone resembling, whether aesthetically or metaphorically, a wank flannel.
Wank Flannels can be given names, such as Towelie.
1. "I wouldn't touch that Dad, That's my wank flannel. Blow your nose with this instead."
2. "That guy is such a wank flannel."
3. "I'm telling you Jimmy, he got so much mayonnaise on his face, he looked like a wank flannel."
4. "I'm not coming out tonight fellas... just a quiet night in, just me and the wank flannel."
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A wank performed while at work and during work hours, usually in the toilets and for the purpose of:
A: Giving yourself a little boost during a particularly unpleasant or difficult task.
B: Rewarding yourself for completing a particularly unpleasant or difficult task.
C: Seeing how much money you can earn from your cunt of a boss just for having a wank.
D: Stopping yourself from feeling the need to molest that hot new girl in reception.
Fuck this self appraisal is doing my head in, I'm off for a work wank.
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Man who likes to wank more than anything else, even more than shopping for cheese
Wank Man:-I think ill have a wank, the cheese can wait!
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Masturbation a period of time prior to intercourse to allow the participant to last longer before ejaculation. Also known as "Strategic wank"
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A wank holiday is a self-imposed period of abstinence from masturbation, either from sustained feelings of guilt, or cramp, or a combination of the two.
Mike felt dirty after having had yet another wank while he thought about gay policemen, so he decided it was time for a wank holiday. If only lasted as long as the next episode of the bill, however.
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This is where you've mildly got the horn but you're tired/had a long day/been wanking all day anyway and then you force yourself to masturbate on top of all that.
Of course, consent is involved, it's not like you have to coerce yourself into grabbing your own genitals - "Oh come on, honey, you'll like it, I promise!" - more that you feel you should have a play, even given the state you're in, and you really try to enjoy yourself, but you heart's just not in it.
i spent two hours on my bully wank and all i got was this lousy orgasm and sleep deprivation.
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