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An early morning discovery of a penis covered in menstrual blood.
"I took home that girl from the bar and fucked her bare-back. The next morning I woke up with a Cranberry Condom"
5👍 1👎
Using a sock (or similar article of clothing) as a way to prevent a spillage of seed. Used exclusively with masturbating males whom create quite the mess.
"John used a cotton condom the other day so he didn't get cum all over his new sheets."
7👍 2👎
Very common among college students. A flimsy paper plate placed on top of a regular plate in order to benefit from the sturdiness of the ceramic plate and the disposability of the paper plate.
Ari: Here, have some chicken.
Pete: Wait! Don't forget the plate condoms or else we'll have to wash the plates after.
Ari: I know, but it doesn't feel as good when I eat with one.
7👍 2👎
When you go to the car wash and they put little plastic bags over your wipers as protection from the "dangers" of the car wash machine.
"aw fuck they put one of them damn wiper condoms on my car again! now I have to not be lazy and go take it off"
7👍 2👎
a fight between two or more people with water-filled condoms. similar to a water balloon fight, but using rubbers.
Shit, I got covered in lube and water in that condom fight.
36👍 21👎
Having anal sex rather than risking pregnancy by having sex the traditional way. This allows for (though isn't advised) unprotected sex without the need to pull out.
However, there have been rare cases where seminal fluid has found its way into the vagina and pregnancy has occurred, so be careful.
"Dude, I totally hooked up with that chick from the club last night, but when we got back to my place I realized I was out of rubbers!"
"Dude, weak! What did you do, Get head instead?"
"Nah, bro, we used nature's condom."
"Nice."
23👍 12👎
A contraceptive that is best compared to a plastic bag like you get at the supermarket. There's really no reason to use one of these, when better options are available for a couple of bucks at the mini mart, and pulling out is free.
Matt: "So Kevin, how was Lindsey last night? Did you beat it up, as usual?"
Kevin: "Hell yeah dogg, I beat that up like I was the school bully."
Matt: "You guys use those female condoms, right?"
Kevin: "Yeah, but she ran out. Fortunately she had just bought groceries at Safeway, so I just strapped on a plastic bag and went at it."
Matt: "Good thinking, man. That's some serious Macgyver shit."
Kevin: "No, not really."
120👍 87👎