herd management

When a person is trying to keep a large number of lovers or potential lovers in contact. Oftentimes by making a quick text throughout the day possibly a generic text that can be copied and pasted to multiple people. The person usually overreaches their span of control and becomes overwhelmed. In the animal kingdom this would be similar to a buck trying to control a large number of doe hence “herd management “

Every morning I get up I gotta do herd management by sending out a text to my girls.

Management Tunnel Vision

When someone of a higher power/management decides to act on impulse regardless of how anyone else feels or has concerns about, in other words they dont give a flying fuck and only care bout their status.

I hate when my managers dont listen to what i have to say, its like they have management tunnel vision.

Campaign manager

Code for pimp. Arranger of the booty. Wingman or wing-girl.

KP: Hey girl, I’m new to town and need a campaign manager, my pussy is drying up
Rabs: I can totally help you hit that - there’s a funraiser at the bar tonight

The mushroom theory of management

An old, time-honored management technique in large corporations.

1. Keep your employees in the dark.
2. Feed them shit.
3. When they grow up, cut them off at the roots.

The CEO of XYZ Corp is a big believer in the mushroom theory of management.

Dinosaur Manager

A football manager that’s been in the game for a long time and been to multiple clubs but not able to provide results for their club and often have the tactics of a goldfish and normally take their team down to relegation.

I hope we don’t get a replacement dinosaur manager like Steve Bruce, Sam Allardyce or Neil Warnock

managing by perkele

refering to the finnish way of managing by loud yelling and threats

my boss Mikko was managing by perkele last night.

Management love-in

A peaceful gathering of senior staff focussing on self-congratulation and bonding, with blissful lack of awareness of duties neglected during the event, and of how pitifully inept, emotionally needy and ludicrous management looks to lower level staff. The more realistic title for such an event is used in confidence, as these events are promoted as a serious and necessary forums.

I'm so flat-out with all this work comen in I haven't got time to scratch meself. And I can't ask (insert manager name) to bring in a casual cos he's at this f**n management love-in.. Oh - look the Caterer - grab us a few sushi before the plates get taken in...