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a hard exterior nobody can hurt your feelings.
dont even try to peel my lemon
y not?
cause i have a steel lemon
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shove your big toe in a bitches schfinkter..wiggle it around a little bit..toe her asshole good..then put your tootsie toe in her mouth.
Dear Journal
I cant stand shit on my thumb so i decided to give my girl a steel toe danish today instead.
Love,
Travolta
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A Steel Wool Virgin is when you are having sex with a woman for the first time and her pubic hair has the consistency and feel of a Brillo Pad (and she doesn't know because no one's ever told her). The coarse, wiry pubic hair, in itself, is not generally the problem; if you are careful, it can be avoided. The problem is when those hairs are long enough to find their way into the mouth of the vagina during sex & make the penis feel like it is being cut by a couple dozen mini-razor blades through out the act. The man is usually too afraid to voice the painful concern's of his penis out of fear that it may end that first encounter & the last thing you want to do is give her a complex. After a few dates, casually bringing up that you like it when women shave usually does the trick with out upsetting her (But, Steel Wool Virgins Must Continue To Shave on a Regular Basis. The only thing worse than the original steel wool hair is feeling that area with three day's worth of stubble. Its like rubbing your testicles with fish wrapped in wet sandpaper. When this happens, the woman is "Deforested", meaning the trees have all been cut down, but the stumps are all still there). On the whole, its not her fault that she doesn't know that she feels like you're having sex with a garbage disposal, so its your responsibility to find a way to change that (specifically before scabs start to form...). If all goes right, but you do break up eventually, you'll be doing the next guy a huge favor.
Man, I was with this Steel Wool Virgin last night and by the time we were done, I needed a blood transfusion, a partial skin graft and a whole lotta band-aids
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Putting it in the rusty steel shack is when you have sexual intercourse with a girl who has her period and then you stick your bloody shaft into her bootyhole.
Yo dude! Did you hear how Brian Greco gave that ugly fat chick the rusty steel shack behind Nirchi's last night!
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RULES:
1) Only allowed to use the same elbow
2) Hit oppenents upper arm in which they are hitting you with.
3) Winner is the person whose oppenent gives up OR falls off his chair. (MUST BE SITTING DOWN DURING GAME TIME @ ALL TIMES)
4) No swinging of the stump ONLY POKING
5) If you miss it still counts as a attack
6) Enjoy responsibly STUMPY STEEL ARM
made by BEN L & DOM G
We at B&D's are hoping you will enjoy this game. If you need practise at Stumpy Steel Arm, bully the smaller and younger people.
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A Michael Steele Second is destined to replace the New York Second as the smallest measurable amount of time in the universe.
A New York Second is defined as the time between a traffic light turning green in New York City and the cab driver behind you honking his horn.
A Michael Steele Second is defined as the time between President Obama leaving the Executive Office of the President of the United States and the firing of Michael Steele as the Chairman of the Republican National Committee.
Man 1: If I were offered that job, I’d have said yes in a Michael Steele Second!
Man 2: You and me both!
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A Michael Steele Minute is destined to replace the New York Minute as the smallest measurable amount of time in the universe.
A New York Minute is defined as the time between a traffic light turning green in New York City and the cab driver behind you honking his horn.
A Michael Steele Minute is defined as the time between President Obama leaving the Executive Office of the President of the United States and the firing of Michael Steele as the Chairman of the Republican National Committee.
Man 1: If I were offered that job, I’d have said yes in a Michael Steele Minute!
Man 2: You and me both!
3👍 3👎