Complete and utter destruction of something or someone
I just Johned the shit out of my girlfriend at cup pong earlier.
When someone orders food but that someone isn't there in time to pick it up.
"Goosh, I really Johned that pizza, didn't I?"
To be completely and utterly obliterated, typically by way of an incredibly forceful skull fucking.
Holy shit man, Eric just got fucking Johned into pink mist!
Person #1: Did you see that Johnning last night?
Person #2: Yeah dude, I haven't seen somebody get Johned like that since Brad got his eyeball ripped out and the empty socket fucked with a 12-incher.
When a “friend” ignores your messages either on purpose or just ignorance.
When a “friend” ignores your messages.
Asked mike to go get a drink but instead i got johned.
To mess up frequently in cases particularity to spelling, grammar, and attracting females.
Guy #1: Look at that guy, he just got denied by that girl.
Guy #2: Ya, he totally johned up.
What's that?
That's John's Immaculate Penis.
Oh.
Also known as The Immaculate Penis of John.