Rural Dictionary

choke on bacon

A common phrase on Southern Wisconsin farms used to describe the act of performing oral sex on a fat and greasy penis.

Farmer Wilbur entered the house after cutting wood on a hot August day and hollered to Mert, "woman come out to the shed and choke on bacon."

by Big-dog-on-porch May 29, 2017

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choke tears

The tears that inevitably press forward from choking on something, ie. a penis.

I gave him a BJ so good that I even had choke tears.

by Argivian February 23, 2014

2👍 1👎

DSM-IV

1) A condition wherein, a person who is an expert at a task, is forced to watch or teach a person who is horrible at the task move really really REALLY slowly. E.G., a luddite using a computer mouse for the first time. The person who is adroit at the task, slowly goes crazy watching the inept person trying to complete this simple thing, and wants to alternately strangle and choke them...but you'd never do such a thing.

2) When walking in a large city, with many pedestrians who are moving slowly, and are not self-aware, that block your path, don't walk straight, stop to take pictures of buildings, et cetera...and you...the fast walker, want to strangle and or choke them and move on...but you'd of course never do such a thing.

3) Anytime you're so pissed at someone or a pet, and you fantasize about strangling and choking them...even though you are so anti-violence that you're a vegan and a card carrying member of Amnesty International

So I'm at my sister's, and holy shit, I effing wanted to strangle-choke her like six times! She's trying to find some pictures on her puter, and I'm showing her how to use Windows Explorer, and WOW, she's a total computer idiot! Finally, I just knocked her ass out of the chair and showed her what to do before someone (her) got strangled, and or choked!

by The Fig June 11, 2011

2👍 1👎

choking chocolate

The act of defecation.
*It is not reflective of the consistency or content of the feces, nor of the ease or difficulty of the passing.
*It is not a reference to confection abuse.
-Origins traced to yurt-dwelling Beverly Hills rednecks.

PRESENT TENSE:
"Where's Susie? Oh I think she's CHOKING CHOCOLATE..."

Placing "SOME" in between "CHOKE" and "CHOCOLATE" is acceptable for both present and past tense usage.

PAST TENSE:
"Susie WENT to choke SOME chocolate."

The past tense is always determined by altering another verb in the sentence rather than changing "CHOKE" to "CHOKED", as "CHOKED" is considered vulgar.
"CHOKING" is acceptable.
ie- "Susie WAS chokING chocolate."

FUTURE TENSE:
"I WILL choke..."
"I INTEND to choke..."
"I shall have been choking..."

Again, the phrase is modified in the sentence structure itself.
"Choking chocolate WILL be the best and last thing I do all day."