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While at you your bachelor party in Denver, one of your best buds slips laxative into your drink without you knowing. So you go to get your lap dance and suddenly can no longer hold your shit inside your body, and just let it go. Your getting married in a week anyways so who cares.
Yo Bobby did you hear about Brian getting that Moist Lap Dance? It was pretty gnar!
2👍 14👎
to take a dump that is so relieving that you may have to lean back and make yourself so comfortable or get into some strange positions, basically giving the toilet a personal 1 on 1
OMG!!!! I been holding this in so long today, when i get home I'm gonna give the toilet a lap dance.
5👍 5👎
When a woman pays a stripper to piss or shit on the woman's breast. Aka when R-kelly did to an underage girl.
The man at club requested a special R-kelly lap dance, for 150$!
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A father that offers his daughter the option of a lap dance.
Father: What you did was wrong and I'm going to have to spank you unless you give daddy a lap dance.
And that is an example of a lap dance option dad.
22👍 55👎
To show kindness to another. To preform an act of charity unexpectedly. Made popular by the Todd N Tyler Radio Empire.
Jim: I was at the supermarket and this midget couldn't get to the Doritos on the top shelf. So got them down for her.
Bob: It always feels good to give an old man a lap dance.
9👍 4👎
The last excuse for not doing something without admitting to laziness. Often used by cat owners and drunks/meth whores
Mom: Timothy, take out the trash!
Tim: I will.
Mom: No, NOW!
Tim: I'm busy.
Mom: BULLSHIT!
Tim: But, I have a cat in my lap!
Bill: Ted, can you hand me a beer.
Ted: Go gret it yershelf....
Bill: Dude, it's right there.
Ted: .....MraI have a crat in m'lap.....
Bill: There's nothing there...where are your pants? ...You have shit on your dick.
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When someone stands that close to you for no reason at all that its ridiculously awkward...
Molly: ah ha how gay is tang...
Me: yo son back it up a lil, yo sittin on my lap standin!
Sitting on my lap while standing... lol
5👍 12👎