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Jacob's Law

This is a fundamental law of manhood. Jacob's Law is that when referring to ones penis in a jokingly or flirtatious manner, you must portray it as smaller than it actually is. This means you never let a girl down once in the sack.

Originating from the Australian outback at Jacob's Creek hence the name

Matthew: I was chatting to this girl last night and ended up having sex
Ben: ah nice, did you use Jacob's Law?
Matthew: yeah for once a girl was fine with my average sized penis

by ciy June 14, 2020


Jacob's Law

During a board game, a player, who has played the game more than once, cannot change their decision for a more advantageous one, once they have finished their turn. A turn that is over, is over!!!

Player 1's turn ends... During player 2's turn, player 1 says... " NO WAIT... I did not mean to do that." Player two says, "Jacob's Law"

by mmaerzluft February 02, 2022


The Laws of Hipsterism

1) One's goal shalt always be in contradiction with one's actions (the Irony Law). The is the foundation of all ye hipsterism, and the law that binds all other laws.

2) Nothing shalt be practical, a hipster shalt do everything for appearances.

2) Finally, a hipster shalt never claim to be a hipster.

Ye Application of The Laws of Hipsterism:

#1
Normal Person: Hey you want to go shopping with me?
Hipster female: No, I don't care about how I look.

(Hipster Female shalt then traverse to ye Olde Thrift store where thou shalt spend one full half day looking for garments)

#2
Normal Person: Hey! I like this artist. Their music is good!!

(Thou buys/downloads album to listen to)

Hipster Guy: *No inner monologue, for hipsters do not think consciously for themselves.

(Thou buys Vinyl to show ye others that thou purchases Vinyls.)

#3
Hipster One: I hate hipsters.

Hipster Two: Me too! God! I'm going to write an entry in Olde English and send it into Urban Dictionary that professes my hate for hipsters!!

Hipster One: Right on dude!! Hey you want to go to the thrift store afterwords to go buy records?

Hipster Two: Sorry man, but I can't I'll be pretty busy writing that entry and my fixed gear bike's in the shop right now.

Hipster One: It's cool dude...I...I love you.

Hipster Two: I...I love you too.
________________________________________________

THESE ARE THE RULES TO BE SPREAD FAR ABOVE THE SKY AND ACROSS THE LAND: FOREVER AND EARNESTLY, UN-IRONICALLY AND FOR THE GOOD OF MANKIND!!!

by smellls June 01, 2011


husband in Law

The guy who hooks up with your exwife

I hope my husband in law didnt wear out the old lady while i was gone

by Suka may korncob January 03, 2019


Theodore's Law

An adage that broadly states: "One will remember what is needed only after they are out the door." The name Theodore is pun-based, on the fact that is nearly homophonous with "The door". Also known as "O. Theodore's Law", as in, "Out the door". Also can be stated as, "If there is something that can be forgotten in packing, it will be forgotten.", though the term is more related to day items.

Coined by Jenn B. on October 12, 2009

"Why do we have to go back?"

"Theodore's Law: my bus pass."

by Warrencraft October 13, 2009


Astolfo Law

Gay people are legally not allowed to find Astolfo attractive because he is a straight male.

It is also required to bust one to Astolfo as a right of passage to become a man.

“Hey man have you completed the Astolfo Law yet.”
Not yet I’m still a child.”

by Real Nigga Billy March 30, 2020


martial law

not just some stupid movie.

The suspension of normal civil law and its replacement by strict military control.

Imposed during crises, emergencies or civil unrest.

Military rules ALL.

suspension of rights and freedoms

Iraq, maybe, after the June 30 pseduo handover.

by rise up rise against June 21, 2004