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One who believes it's wrong to eat meat and byproducts of animals, but thinks they're a vampire in the traditional sense.
See Deadgod.
Wow, that fucktard deadgod says he is a vampire but won't touch animal meat.
35👍 31👎
When, right after getting up, you are blinded by bright light from the T.V, fridge, etc.
God my mom came in to wake me up and turned my light on... i hate when she does that. Giving me Vampire Vision and stuff.
48👍 48👎
One who secretly reads the Twilight trilogy because they are afraid to be like everyone else. Or they don't want to be harassed by haters.
Usually they read them in the dark, and don't tell anybody they read them.
Person 1 - "I hate Twilight and everyone who reads them."
Person 2 - "Sure you do, Everyone knows your a closet vampire."
7👍 4👎
That guy with a funny speech impedement and long nasty hair that insists on wearing a black trenchcoat EVERYDAY and sharpening his fingernails to a point. He constantly talks about meaningless goings-ons in the media industry and swears his allegiance to a single overrated and tired genre of games and movies and TV. When he interacts with anyone else other than his vampire entity that lives in his brain, he regards other humans with one part cinicism and two parts social incompetence; thus resulting in a state of celebacy for all eternity. BEWARE: he will threaten to bite you, but it will only result in a seering staredown and a feeble attemp at insulting your masculinity.
"That Wannabe Vampire is just jealous at my sup3rior H4X0r ski11z."
17👍 14👎
A bitch that you only want to be with in the dark.
Yo my vampire bitch is sooo ugly, but she fucks soooo good.
16👍 13👎
Girl 1: Ugh.. I started my period. Did you bring any tampons?
Girl 2: Do you mean a Vampire Penis?
8👍 5👎
When a woman has been wearing a bikini in the sun all day and she goes home and takes it off, her ass is completely white.
I now have a great tan except I have a vampire ass
14👍 11👎