Fuck me with a ragman's trumpet

Expression of surprise, quite long but effective at getting all the surprisedness out in one breath. For 'ragman' think Steptoe/Sanford & Son. Aha.

'Well fuck me with a ragman's trumpet. There IS a Santa.'

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blowing his own trumpet

To boast about oneself, to speak very proudly and positively about oneself. In AmE, "to blow one's own horn"

John is blowing his own trumpet again, he is telling everyone he is the best sales manager of our Company.

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Stank-Chunk Trumpet

This occurs when you burp really loudly , then precede to blow the burp into someones face, often times followed by small bits of food from your freshly eaten lunch.

Christy coulndt stand the force from my stank-chunk trumpet

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cigar smoking trumpet player

1. When a man asks his woman to lie down whilst he places his testicles in her mouth and asks his woman to perform hand-job on his penis. The man then asks his woman to hum creating a vibrating sensation on the balls. This bring great pleasure for the man. The man then asks his woman to close her eyes, the woman knows she is in for surprise. The man takes a drag from his pipe. While holding in his smoke the man excretes feces on his woman's face and exhales the smoke in the same general area. This creates the illusion of a cigar smoking trumpet player.

Jon Nguyen: My woman is cigar smoking trumpet player
Chi Voung: Wow how you get woman to be so tarented?

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lead trumpet player energy

like big dick energy, but related to brass and jazz band. absolute confidence. no fear.

man that blues solo was kind of choppy but his lead trumpet player energy sold it

Blowing his own trumpet

For one person to be standing in front of disintersted people bragging about how much of a champion he is at everthing he does, whilst the others listening are thinking of how much af a loser he really is.

Tony : when I was I the army I was Sargent of 11 people bla bla bla, and I did this.... and I did that.....bla bla bla.
Greg (thinking):here we go, he is blowing his own trumpet again. you are really an absolute moron,,,what a dickhead.

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little brass trumpet

kind of like a semi-boner, only not as much. usually caused by a not so hott chick that has a nice body.

I had a little brass trumpet when i was looking down her shirt at her nice tits, it's just too bad she's fugly.

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