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Ronnie Barker was THE legend of comedy. Loads funnier than all of this American "comedy". I.e: Friends. (the only funny bit in the entire history of that programme is when Chandler walks into the spa naked and says: "So, I guess we wear swimsuits in here") Ronnie Barker is famous for the TV series' Porridge, Open All Hours ands The Two Ronnies Show. (You can watch some by typing Ronnie Barker into youtube) Even though he died last year, he died a legend.
Customer: Fork Handles
Shopkeeper: Fork Handles? (hands customer four candles)
Customer: No, fork handles. Handles for forks.
Ronnie Barker = Shopkeeper
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Terry: Hey Phil, did your dog just shit in my garden?
Phil: No Tel, you must be mistaken. Thats a barkers egg.
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The art of throwing one's semen at rapid speed.
"After playing Cliver Barker's undying, I wanted to dabble in the skill that is; Clive Barkering."
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The country does not have time for sideshows and carnival barkers.
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When someone fucks a prostitute doggie style and then proceeds to donkey punch her knocking her unconcious thus not having to pay. And while exiting the premises you yell "the price is right, bitch!"
"While attending a bachelor party in Vegas I "Bob Barkered two whores in one night." "The price WAS right!"
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An old man who hosted the popular gameshow "The price is right" for countless years. He retired recently, and doubtless the show will flop after his departure.
"Hey man, did you hear that Bob Barker is done? He's retiring."
"Oh well, that show is finished. He was the only reason it was good, even though he runs on triple A batteries.
"Hey Bob Barker, can I have your autograph?"
"Well, well, let me see son, what now?"
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Travis Barker is the former drummer of Blink-182, Boxcar Racer, The Aquabats and now of The Transplants and Plus 44. He has his own reality show-ish thing on MTV called "Meet The Barkers". He's married to former Miss USA Shanna Moakler and hes 2 kids with her (and a daughter from Shanna and Oscar de la Hoya). He pretty much reigns over mainstream drumming right now and shows no signs of slowing. Mr. Barker is quite good at what he does. He has quite a creative way about his drumming. Tom Delong has been known to say Travis is the best drummer he's ever seen (go watch Riding In Vans With Boys if you've been living under a rock for the past 5 years). And to a certain Mr. "genuine article", i would like to inquire if you yourself play the drums. I myself have been playing the drums for 6 years and regard Travis Barker as one of the best drummers out there right now. He's fast as hell and no two of his songs sound the same.
Oh, and Travis Barker is a sexy sexy beast...
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