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I have a secret; her name is Yenta Claus. My secret brings me toys just like Santa Claus, just different. See, she is Jewish and no one else in the whole wide world knows about her because she is a secret.
I asked Yenta Claus for a new brother.
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The guy who gives presents to all kids south of the border.
Merry Christmas, from one Mexican to another!!!
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The term "Santa Claus" is an American distortion of the Dutch name "San Niccolaus", meaning "Saint Nicolas". He is known by many other names around the world, such as "Kris Kringle" in some places and "Father Christmas" in Great Britain. Saint Nick was a Catholic bishop in what is now modern Turkey during the days of the Roman Empire. He left gifts for poor people in his town and after he died the legend of St. Nick coming to homes in a chariot carrying presents for good people was born. The legend was spread along with Christianity and when that faith reached the Arctic St. Nick started riding a sleigh pulled by flying reindeer. The legend spread around the globe and in the 20th century in America Coca-Cola provided the modern image of "Santa" as fat, jolly, rotund, with white hair and beard, wearing a red suit and black boots and of course, drinking a bottle of Coke. He is beloved by children all over.
Santa Claus is based on a real person, just like many "fairy tales" and myths that have existed throughout history.
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A fat, drunk man that breaks into your house every Christmas. Often seen wearing red and abusing animals (Reindeer, dogs , cats, etc.) for the purpose of moving around. Often has a gang of short people that dress up in green outfits.
Did you see Mr. Johnson the other day? He was such a Santa Claus!
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He is the man that does what Santa Claus does Christmas Eve he sneaks in the house at night and drops off some gifts, Sancho Claus in the other hand drops one GIFT and that's for the wife everytime husband is out to work
Guy#1 Hey man my wife has been to tired for sex lately I'm worried I think she might be sick or something..
Guy#2 I dont know man that's what my ex wife used to tell me until I found out Sancho Claus was coming over every time I came to work!!!!
Guy#1 no fucking way man that explains those bruises on her legs...
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The code name for a pedifile that has cannot be caught because he knows when your awake. Think about it...first he watches children to see if the are being "naughty" or "nice" then on christmas eve he breaks into home in the middle of the night, leaves "presents" for little "boys and girls", eat ALL the cookies and drinks up all the white stuff then leaves with a sadistic "ho ho ho".
kid1* did santa claus come to your house last night?
kid2* i...i don't wanna talk about it *bursts into tears*
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He's making a list and checking it twice. Apparently, he'll find out who's naughty or nice.
Santa Claus is coming to town.
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