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the day that pedophiles get home delivery
KID 1: "Hey lets go to this house"
KID 2: "Nah man that dude's a pedophile. He's always extra weird on halloween."
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Halloween was originally a pagan Irish holy festival. When Ireland converted to Roman Catholicism, the Church gave Halloween a Christian connotation.
Halloween is now an excuse for children to dress up and beg for candy!
24👍 10👎
My favorite holiday. Halloween is when children (and anyone else who can get away with it) get tons of free candy. It's also a very amusing holiday and there a lots of parties that are epic. The end.
Halloween is great.
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A holiday in October where men dress up, and women dress down.
Classic Halloween examples include women dressing up like animals, nurses and "bad cops" while men dawn robes of the clergy.
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Annual holiday most common in the US, when children go door-to-door in costumes hoping to recieve candy.
I can't wait to go trick-or-treating this Halloween.
34👍 18👎
Halloween is an ancient Celtic festival that celebrates (or celebrated) the Lord of the Dead. During their festivals, they dressed in scary costumes and carved scary faces on turnips (and now pumpkins) to scare the evil demons away, and made huge bonfires where they burnt offerings to the pagan gods (like vegetables and children - nice mix, huh?)
Later, since the Pagans wouldn't stop their death celebrations, the Christian church changed the name to All Saints' day (a celebration of the Christian saints instead) and voilà! Now everyone's beliefs are combined and everyone is happy. Then from that was All Hollow's Eve, and so on and so forth until it was Halloween.
Now, little kids run around in princess costumes collecting candy from strangers and decorating their homes with death symbols.
...I'm sure that the princess costumes did a much better job at scaring the demons.
Person: Hey, what are you being for Halloween this year?
Other person: I'm gonna be a witch with freaky hair. What are you gonna be?
Person: Haha, I'm gonna be a dead cheerleader.
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An excuse for everybody!
For teenage girls to dress like sluts!
For little boys to dress up like robots and aliens and not be teased!
For nerds to cosplay as things no sane person has ever heard of!
For adults to get roaring drunk and not be given a second look!
For paedophiles to hand out free candy to willing little children!
For idiots to watch the same three horror movies they watched last year!
And for silent misanthropes to bang their head against the wall for another four hours.
(Day after Halloween)
Jack: Hey, did you see that horror movie at Dan's place last night?
Bob: No, I couldn't get there. The road was too blocked up with slutty teenage girls, cosplay geeks, drunken adults and possible child predators.
Jack: Good thing I'm a silent misanthrope, then.
Bob: Agreed.
5👍 1👎