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Usually a very handsome, smart and athletic guy. If he leaves you alone at midnight, when its raining and you have no clue how to get home, take it personal, because to everyone else hes super nice. So he either likes you or he hates you for absolutly no reason, there is no in between. Fuck you
Hello, its-a me, Mario!
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Don't get me wrong, I love the game. But I think it's time to cut the crap. You people deserve the true definition of how this all started.
Mario is a plumber who hates his crap life-no pun intended-so he gets fucked up off mushrooms and goes on crazy adventures with his brother, Luigi. The goal of his adventures is saving a stupid princess who seems to get a kick off getting kidnapped by a giant turtle named Bowser (how she doesn't run away from a slow moving turtle is beyond me).
Most common occurrence on those adventures is finding green shrooms and getting even more fucked up that they gain an extra life! 2nd most common is finding red shrooms and now they grow about 10 feet in size.
They find coins sometimes, only to support their drug habits and get more shrooms. In the old games, they used to find a raccoon suit that made them fly, but nowadays, they don't find any good shrooms to do that anymore. Fire flower power up is really diarrhea kicking in.
Goombas= dog turds, for some reason it's fun to stomp on them. They have no hands, they can't do anything to you.
When they lose a life, it's really the shrooms wearing off, until it's game over and then they wake up in jail.
You got any shrooms? Mario hears a princess in need of rescuing.
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Well-known video game character that has taken shrooms while retaining several occupations including doctor, plumber, carpenter, and referee amongst others. The side effects of shrooms are evident in most every Mario title; such hallucinations include stars with eyes, talking mushrooms that wear vests, dinos that love fruit and wear shoes, turtles with horns and spikes breathing fire, turtles and brown mushroom things w/ or w/o wings, everyday things such as hills with eyes, clouds with eyes who carry shelled creatures who themselves carry fishing poles, monkeys that haven't thrown poo (that I know of) and wear stylish ties and hats, and a whole lot of other shit. In his spare time, Mario plays a variety of sports including tennis and golf, throws parties, and fights other mascots with melee smashes. His usual task is to save the princess, which involves a lot of jumping.
Also, he is a possible candidate for president of the U.S. at anytime. He's an ideal choice because he can kick ass in his plumber's fashion, while shooting fireballs out his fists and breaking blocks with his head.
The fact that he has taken a lot of shrooms while retaining the right to be a doctor is very creepy. He has taken a lot of shrooms and has kept a lot of jobs and performs leisure activities, that's fucking awesome.
Mario for president in 2008.
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An Italian extremist who terrorizes mushrooms, gorillas, turtles, and many other poor innocent creatures. All is well in the mushroom kingdom when this terrorist invades, searching for a prostitute known as Princess Peach. None shall stand in his way, as is demonstrates when defacing the kingdom, ripping up fire flowers, destroying boxes, and murdering innocent citizens. The king of the kingdom, Dr. Bowser, tried to have a peaceful negotiation with this threat to society, but to no avail. Mario continues to threaten the once peaceful land...
He is also prominent in other locations, notably, space, where he flies from planet to planet spreading his wrath. This interstellar warfare can be seen in the Super Mario Galaxy games for Wii.
Who can stop this madman?
Guy 1: hey Mario acts all cool, but he's really a douche. What did the goombas ever do to him eh?
Guy 2: well they do move sideways in a slow manner, hoping to touch Mario and cause him to spin and fall from the screen, with annoying music in the background.
Guy 1: whatever... all I'm saying is that this dude needs to CHILLAX
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An italian name, great in bed makes women happy and asking for more. 3 inches more of penis than DENNIS GRIFFIN.
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1. A Freewill thinker who is capable of many accomplishments
2. A Recording Artist in the SouthWest Arizona Territory
3. A Sexual genius with the swagger of Austin Powers
4. Has awesomeness oozing out his very being!
Dumb Slut 1: That guy totally just walked up to me and talked me out of my number.... I don't even know why I gave it to him...
Dumb Slut 2: Well he looked cute what's the problem?? Besides... he reminds me of a Mario!
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A "Mario" is a man falsely accused of sexual misconduct, named after DeMario Jackson, who was falsely accused by drunken Bachelor in Paradise contestant Corinne Olympios but cleared because video tape evidence showed she consented.
Princess Corinne from Paradise will choose to get drunk
And falsely accuse a Mario she used for sexual gratification.
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