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Matt Damon Syndrome

A recently discovered mental disorder with no known cure. Patients have been shown to demonstrate unusual behaviors such has:
1. Getting stuck in somewhere you shouldn't get stuck in (like Mars, a planet in another universe or Nazi territory)
2. Make others risk their lives to save you
3. Tricking others to risk their lives to save you
3. Amnesia
4. Tendency to beat others to death with peculiar objects (eg. Magazines)
5. Having unusually high levels of intelligence
6. Have an unusual tendency to kill Nazis
7. Being exceptionally stubborn
8. Fighting against authoritarian governments
9. Planning elaborate heists
10. Only being able to say your own name

Researchers have not agreed on a single explanation to how it spreads or what causes it, but they have identified several key symptoms. The first patient to be diagnosed with this disorder is Matt Damon.

You may be have Matt Damon Syndrome if you:
1. Lost all your brothers
2. Survived assassination attempt
3. Are an astronaut
4. Your wife is dead
5. Are a horse
6. Are a cowboy
7. Look like Matt Damon

If know someone who displays the above symptoms, call a psychiatrist immediately.

This message has been brought to you by the World National Matt Damon Syndrome Awareness Medical Funding Organization. Donations in cash, check, pay pal, credit card, wire or sexual favors accepted.

Matt's agent: Recently, Matt's been acting strangely. After his wife was killed by the government, he robbed a Casino by pretending he was a janitor. He then used the money to buy a spaceship with a wisecracking robot to fly to Mars. Then he started beating Martian Nazis to death with a magazine shouting "MATT DAMON!" We had to send Tom Hanks to save him, but he only agreed to come home on the condition Tom would dress up as a cowboy and rode him back to the spaceship. But the airlock exploded and he now has Amnesia. By the way, you look like Robin Williams."
Matt's shrink: "Thanks. Well, it seems that Matt suffers from a serious case of "Matt Damon Syndrome". "
Matt's agent: " Oh my god! Come to think of it, he does look kind of like Matt Damon! I wouldn't have known if the WNMDSAMFO didn't tell me about it!"

Matt Damon: "Hi. I'm Matt Damon. You might think Matt Damon Syndrome is a ridiculous disorder. However,it is, unfortunately, a very real disease and over 6 billion children are suffering from it. Since Matt Damon was diagnosed with this disease in 1679, the WNMDSAMFO was founded in 1682 by Matt Damon, aiming to raise awareness and reduce the suffering of those diagnosed with the disorder. If you want to make a difference for those with the disorder, donate to us now. Your philanthropy will be much appreciated by those with the disease. That's 7 billion children. So donate now. This is Matt Damon, over and out."

This message has been brought to you by the WNMDSAMFO.

by Notesarefortheweak October 17, 2015

8👍 4👎


Matt Damon Scarf

The act of shitting on a partners neck and covering the neck in it. Like that brown scarf Matt Damon wore in some old forgotten movie.

Person#1:Haha dude I gave your mom a Matt Damon Scarf.
Person#2:Suprise bitch I gave your dad one too.
Person#1:Fuck you

by Anonymous Magic Man December 13, 2009

4👍 4👎


She's fucking Matt Damon

A situation where one partner in a couple has ended the relationship by dating, and having immediate intimate relations with a new person of perceived higher social status.

See trading up

Frank: Are Sandra and Kasey still together?

Jim: No, I hear she's dating some 25 year old brain surgeon. He's loaded plus he looks like a male model. Word on the street is he took her to Mexico for the weekend.

Frank: Wow. Well, she's fucking Matt Damon.

by Knowmadd April 12, 2008

12👍 5👎


Let's put down the guitar and f*ck Matt Damon

An expression, depicting the desire for progression to another task, derived from the recent viral video war between Jimmy Kimmel and Matt Damon as facilitated by Kimmel's girlfriend Sarah Silverman.

"Halo 3's played out. Let's put down the guitar and f*ck Matt Damon."

"Sure. Wait? What the f*ck did you just say?"

,or,

Dude, you're always skipping from one thing to the next. For once could you just hold on to the guitar and NOT f*ck Matt Damon!

by Derek Weyhrauch February 27, 2008

23👍 11👎


Asian Matt Damon

The asian dude, your crush is fucking, that stares you down everytime he sees you in public and looks like he thinks he's the coolest dude on earth.

A:See asian matt damon over there, how can you fuck that?!
B:Yeah bro wierd.

by EndlessMe November 15, 2019


Matt Damon

A group of toads.

A Matt Damon is a group of toads.

by Sykojaz September 27, 2017


You're Matt Damon

You're the man (sometimes used sarcastically)

Johnny: "Remember when I predicted this would happen? Looks like I was right.
Jenny: "You're Matt Damon"

by P_Low September 13, 2023