Random
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a hypothetical situation used to trick someone into believing something kinda ridiculous
jimmy: you can eat poker chips?
kappy: oh my god, how did you buy that gift?
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Referes to a person who regularly follows-through on a fart.
To "Gift" someone is to poo whilst farting in someone's house or on their property.
A person who "gifts" is referred to as
"Gifted"
"He gifted the front seat of my car!"
"He gave in the hallway whilst wearing a bathtowel"
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A gift that is actually intended for the person giving rather than the supposed recipient. Based on Homer's gift to Marge of a bowling ball (with his name engraved on it) in the Simpson's episode "Life on the Fast Lane."
Bob: “She got me a gym membership for my birthday.”
Doug: “That is such a Homer Gift. She is tired of being seen in public with your tubby ass!”
Her room mate unexpectedly walked in while she was furiously mastering the gift!
A person who adds their name to a gift tag in order to claim partial credit for giving the gift.
I'm totally broke so I had to be a gift parasite and sign on that present you're giving Grandma.
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a) A brilliant invention of retailers whereby they can lock in advance sales without providing any goods or services, knowing that the gift card will force the recipient into their store who will most likely spend an additional amount above & beyond the card value, although the retailer ultimately hopes that the gift card will be lost or destroyed before said goods or services are redeemed.
b) A device whereby the giver can impose their will upon the receiver, but not necessarily provide the receiver with want they want.
c) A financial instrument providing income for 3rd parties, who purchase unneeded gift cards for 90 cents on the dollar and resell them for 95 cents on the dollar.
d) A foolish thing to send in the mail to a friend.
I'm giving gift cards so my friends can eat at restaurant "x" and see a movie at theater "y". I don't want to give cash and trust them to honor my request to go enjoy dinner and a movie at their favorite places.
I didn't realize that sending a gift card in the mail is even dumber than mailing cash. In fact, a gift card in an envelope is much easier for a thief to detect than cash. I guess that's why someone invented CHECKS many years ago, duh.
The act of submerging your hands into water for an extended period of time allowing them to become wrinkled, then proceeding to finger a girl with your wrinkled hands.
Man 1: "Dude, how was your date with Vicky?"
Man 2: "It was alright. We got in the hot tub, then I totally gave her Grandpa's Gift."