A pathetic multi-course "home cooked" meal gleaned from the outer reaches of a bachelor's refrigerator or cabinets.
"Brah, last night was crazy depressing. I watched re-runs of Magnum P.I. and feasted on a bachelor buffet of pasta with mustard, fried ham cubes, Froot Loops, powdered Gatorade and leftover white rice from Hing Long."
24π 2π
The act of grabbing a woman's breast, instead of the usual handshake. Then as she raises her hand to slap you in the face high five her. Walk away like a fucking badass.
Joe: I got a restraining order filed against me.
Bob: Why?!
Joe: I gave a bachelor's handshake at the club last night.
Bob: Woah! You're such a badass
24π 2π
A condition commonly seen in fridges of single people, and people living as roommates, in which the fridge contains 237 half-empty condiment jars, leftover pizza and takeout, and not much else.
In severe cases, there may also be tupperware containers that everyone is scared to open, full of unidentified stuff that may once have been food, or dairy products that have passed their expiry dates multiple times. In these cases, it is not recommended to attempt to clean the fridge without proper biohazard gear.
Bachelor fridge is usually more of a cyclical phenomenon than a permanent state. People who suffer from bachelor fridge often go through phases where they buy real groceries and cook meals, alternating with periods of bachelor fridge.
Roommate 1: We have a bad case of bachelor fridge.
Roommate 2: I was thinking we should clean the fridge, throw out all the rotten stuff, and then go buy groceries and cook ourselves a nice dinner.
Roommate 1: Nah, I'm too tired. Let's just order pizza.
17π 1π
A Bachelor Plate actually refers to a lack of an actual plate. Most of the time the use of a bachelor plate entails eating over the sink or a trash can in order to avoid cleaning/owning an actual plate.
Man 1: Dude, your steak is ready.
Man 2: Why did you just bring me my steak on a fork? Where is the plate bro?
Man 1: I donβt own any, I use bachelor plates, so you can either eat over the trashcan or the sink, your call.
Man 2: Sink, I call the sink!
172π 31π
Grabbing a girls tit, And when she goes to smack you, You give her a Highfive
guy one Dude I grabbed Jessie's tit.
guy two What did she do
guy one Nothing cause I gave her a Bachelor Handshake
An application of deodorant, in lieu of an actual shower.
I was a bit stinky this morning, but a quick bachelor shower sorted that out. 'Til lunchtime, anyway.
21π 2π
The process of cooking and consuming breakfast (depending on the time of day) at the stove directly out of the frying pan in an effort to conserve dishes.
Kelso dominated his scrambled eggs and bacon with only the use of a fork and a frying pan (spachela not included)... the Bachelor Breakfast of a true champion!
101π 21π