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A technique where a used, prefferably lubricated condom is slapped upon an unsuspected face.
" Man, Devin was so drunk that Josh just walked right up to him and gave him the old Texas Parachute."
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A rarely occuring anomaly in which the penis is protruding through the end of a condom upon completion of a sexual act involving penetration. The rubber o-ring is all that is left to fasten the tattered rubber to the penis. Often times this will be followed by an "Oh shit" and possibly a purchase of the morning after pill. Mythically caused by rough sex; some believe that parachute penis is a syndrome caused by canine molars deep within the vaginal orphace.
Every time I have sex with my slam piece, I get parachute penis.
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When someone blows speed up your anal orifice.
The playmate I dated stuck a speed parachute up my ass once without really letting on to what she was up to and holy fuck I was a chunk of granite and must of pumped a few quarts of chowder out whenever she decided I should. That was one fucked up fuck fest. Mostly in the kitchen.
When semen is ejaculated and floats gracefully towards the ground.
Usually performed from a height.
Guy 1: "One time when I was on holidays. I was doing my best doggy style with this bird on a balcony, I pull out, shoot the business over the edge and it floated down like a Salty Parachute"
Guy 2: "No you didn't!"
When you stuff the base of a toilet with tissue paper to avoid an embarrasing splash and also to avoid taking the blame for the rancid smells as you leave. This is usually accompanied by very careful, stealthily release of ones flatulance. For added effect you can also shoot a disaproving look towards an engaged cubicle as you wash your hands (making sure fellow hand-washers see) to shift the blame onto an unsuspecting victim. This especially applies in a public bathroom and is typically actioned by women.
The bathroom in the shopping centre was packed, so to keep her dignity, Sarah let rip with a PARACHUTE POO, thus leaving everyone oblivious to the fact that it was her that just cut the cheese.
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During World War II, our British allies were the first to use parachuting pooches with their army's newly formed airborne regiments; their special SAS forces, also used them as well behind enemy's lines in both North Africa and France.
The search and rescue sections of the No. Atlantic Transport Command, U.S. Army Air Corp began its own experimenting
in 1942, with the dropping of dogs, their sleds, and a flight surgeon by parachute directly to crash scene in the frozen north; where a quick response could mean the difference in the survival of an injured flier or crew.
The Army parachute dogs wore a coat like harness, lined with sheep skin, developed by the QMC. It was found, that two dogs could be dropped together with a twenty-eight ft. chute, while one could land safely with the regulation twenty-four foot chute.
Most of the experimentation was conducted at Fort Nelson, British Columbia, under the direction of a Major Joseph F. Westover. The knowledge that was learnt there, was to enable scout dogs to be used by the U.S. Army Airborne troops in Europe.
The war dog, Jaint de Mortimormey reputedly made more jumps during World War II than any man. Although no training was ever formally adopted for parachuting pooches, they were used quite extenively during the war.
There's a story told about a poor doberman, who was unceremoniously kicked out the door of a plane, with a special parachute attached to a static line. Part of a special airborne unit, the dog shortly after landing, started to growled, and sure enough, coming over a rise were four germans, who never made it back to the fatherland.
Was World War II the first use of parachuting pooches?
Surprisely...no...although they weren't part of any formal program or even an unofficial outfit, there were some mascot dogs, like Jeff pictured above, who were parachuting with their masters, as early as 1920, shortly after the Great War. Jeff alone made thirteen jumps, twelve successfully, he was the mascot of the 120th Colorado Air National Guard.
SEE ALSO: WWIIOL
When are we gonna get parachuting dogs? - Subotai
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Tight fitting, if not slightly long, nylon pants. Often with excess of 8 pockets/zippers, parachute pants were rampant in the Eighties. They were brought back to the market sometime in the mid-Nineties as 'Nylon Jeans'. Parachute pants are often mistaken for Baggy or poofy 'MC Hammer-esque' pants, which in actuality are known as ASTRO-pants.
Skariachi saxophonist/singer Kole 'Flash' Maravilla is a large supporter of the Parachute pants.
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