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Young children; offspring, kids, spawn, etc.
Hey Helen?
How's that little carpet pig of yours doing?
Has he gotten into any mischief lately?
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Something the world should never be witness to. If your friend has a carpeted kitchen, instantly unfriend them in real life and any social media you have.
Friend 1: hey man, can we go over to Charlie’s?
Friend 2: doesn’t he have a Carpeted Kitchen?
Friend 1: oh good point, let’s just tell him we are busy
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A Carpet Suit is worn by someone who is routinely late to work. The suit allows them to blend in with the work environment and sneak into their office / cubical unnoticed. This suit allows their arrival at work to go undetected by those that sit near them. A carpet suit wearer will never say "good morning" or start a conversation until near lunch.
Tom - Boy I did not even hear Jim come in...
Steve - Yeah, he must have worn his carpet suit in today!
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Prickly region that was shaved a couple days ago
"Oh dang, my girlfriend hasn't shaved in a couple days and my junk got chewed up by her shark carpet."
Burnley Carpet: Inexpensive brown floor covering, popular in the north of England.
Flattened out cardboard boxes.
Just moved into the bedsit, it has a lovely Burnley Carpet.
When a baby is conceived by semen picked up off of the carpet. Often done by the "scooting method" where the male ejaculates onto the carpet and then the female scoots her vagina across the semen-covered area.
Ethan's insecurities arose upon the discovery that he himself was a carpet baby.
Oooo that boy is so fine I’d have his carpet babies!
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the semi-dry gelatinous goo found on the floor by your other half's PC, usually amongst the crumpled tissues.
wtf's all that carpet custard doing there? I just cleaned this fucking floor you wanker!
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