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One who no longer consumes hard liquor but still drinks beer.
Fred’s wife was nagging him about getting too hammered drinking bourbon on weekends, so he decided to get Midwest sober.
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A date centered around a particularly Midwestern activity. Like 'Yote Huntin', deer driving or perhaps a rousing ride in the harvester combine with your significant other.
ex.1
Jane: "oh Norma, the other day me and Bob went and sat in his tree-stand for 7 hours starting at 4am!"
Norma: "I wish I could go on more Midwest date!"
ex.2
Ross: "Did you see how many 'coons me and Jim got the other night!?"
Joel: "Yeah! You should have taken the miss'es with you"
ex.3
Midwestern 8th Grader: "Emma and Jared sittin' in a tree, K I L L I N G!"
A different 8th Grader: "duh it's a Midwest Date!"
When someone's balls are being tazered while giving a Hot Carl, the result is a passionate hailstorm of streaming poo in the face.
She wasn't sure about Jeff until the first time he delivered a midwest thunderbumper, after which she knew she was really in love.
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The point at which a person who used to have ambitions realizes that they live in a state in the American Midwest, and overcompensates for the fact by purchasing BMWs and Cadillacs which they most likely cannot afford.
The United States geographical equivalent of a midlife crisis.
Steve: Hey, what's Mark doing in that Caddy?
Chester: It finally hit him that he lives in Iowa; the car's his way of coping with the Midwest crisis.
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The winter wardrobe of males ages 12-19 in the midwest. Generally consists of baggy shorts and t-shirts/wifebeaters. Most who dress this way think it makes them look tough for braving the sub-20-degree temperatures in summer clothes, although they usually just end up looking like douchebags.
John had to borrow Matt's coat because he wore a Midwest Snowsuit to the Christmas light display.
A midwest tradition where, some time after drama, everyone is assumed to be forgiven, and life resumes as usual.
A: She just kinda started acting normal around me again
B: Sounds like a midwest apology
When you take a dump on the floor in front of the layaway counter at Kmart.
Only two more Midwest Layaway deposits, and that VHS Box set of Full House Season 3 is totally mine.