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Random
It happens usually when there's nobody around and you're in a dark room. Most likely, soon after you sit on the couch you will ask "Helloooo?" to make sure truly nobody is in the room. On occasion, someone will crack up laughing at your stupidity and give away their hiding place.
Example 1:
Person 1: "I'm just going to sit on this couch now.....helloooo?"
Person 2: "......HAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAH"
Example 2:
Person 1(on the phone): Yo man, I'm sitting on a couch right now. ... wait up,...hello???
Person 2: (on the other line): "ok then.."
Person 3(hiding): "AHAHAHHAHA YOU'RE SUCH AN IDIOT"
when a fat butted bitch hogs the couch for an extended length of time
"that couch pumpkin is still playing that stupid fucking game."
"what a cunt."
When someone takes amphetamines and makes the mistake of sitting down for too long. They have now become one of the couch and there usually is no return.
The feeling is usually rather bliss but also very annoying to the people they were with who did not get stuck and just wanna get down and boogie
Person 1: Oi lets go dance
Couch cooker: Nah man, just another ciggie plus this couch feels good.
Person 1: Bro, get up or you're going to get couch cooked.
Noun: A place of safety or refuge from social outcast, embarrassment, and ridicule constructed via cushion, fabric, and puffs; an inlet of refuge from post-intoxication induced stupidity and promiscuity; the vessel in which one watches horror films, psychological thrillers, or consumes the Domino's pizza (occasionally by the grace of sirmarmasir, all 3 at a time).
"Yo gypsy, you think you're in couch safety right now? You're not - get back to the frialator and don't be stealing no McNuggets!"
"Judy enveloped herself in the swaft of couch safety and began her on-demand rental of 'The Ruins'...'Ah' she thought to herself, 'what a perfect Sunday afternoon'."
A girl that fucks around with a lot of guys in the same group. Or snapchat whore that does nothing but sends nudes to every guy that adds her.
"Why would he want Brenna she's the community couch?"
"Fuck if I know. She's easy? Hope he doesn't grab bed bugs and fleas."
The act of, slapping tacos out of said people's mouths
Slap the taco out ya mouth, "green couch"
- Action Bronson
A crude seminal discharge, created by Colorado Frat boy after he prematurely ejaculates to someone's daughter.
A Transcendental Meditation sacrament.
Those frat boys are pigs, he left a whole load of couch chowder on my furnature.