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A solo version of a blumpkin usually performed by jerkin it while taking a dump. It is usually performed by a Cringelord to the memory of some unrequited love. If the performer is short a couple ribs, either through surgical means or birth defect, may also be done full-simulation style.
Person A: Hey man, where did Cringelord go? he isn't bothering your friend again is he? I mean he's been after her so long when she's made it clear she just isn't that into him.
Person B: Nah, he just went to take a dump.
Person A: Oh, so he's doing a simulated blumpkin?
Person B: Yup...
A blowjob in a port-o-potty. Lavatory indicator should show half red, half green.
"After a Coco Loco, I found myself needing to void my bowels, only to find the lavatory occupied by two men engaging in a Dolores Blumpkin."
The action of giving a blowjob to an individual having a bowel movement on the toilet, followed by eating the contents of their ass with their tongue
Steven got drunk last night and ended up giving Freddie Freeman a frosted blumpkin
The male drinks a whole bottle of hot sauce, then when his stomach gets ready to explode the girl fills her mouth with jalapeño peppers and blows him while he's shitting, making sure to pay attention to his dickhole.
Me: Larry why are you walking so funny?
Larry: My girlfriend gave me a Devil's Blumpkin last night and I'm burning through my dickhole to my asshole.
When a person uses a bathroom stall glory hole, while positioning themselves just right so they can defecate into the toilet next to them while recieving favors through said glory hole.
John walked into the stall with the sole intention of a number two, but the inviting voice from the other side of the stall's glory hole was too much for him, and he found himself caught in the midst of a blumpkin surprise.
While a man is shitting and receiving a bj another man runs in as you finish and shoves her head between his legs into the shitty water
I sure gave marge from hr a nice blumpkin bomb this morning.
When you breastfeed while your taking a shit.
I love it when my wife lets me have a boobie blumpkin.