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Having sex with a woman who is having her period.
Ugh ... my girlfriend just got her period, so now I gotta introduce John Thomas to Aunt Flo tonight!
The relative coolness of a person or object is defined by a value inversely proportional to the square of the distance of said object or person from John Stamos.
Bob Saget is only cool because of the John Stamos Proximity Effect after he was on Full House
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A famous painter who loved to create magnificent detailed and colorful artwork-renderings of the different makes/models of zippy cars that traverse Germany's high-speed motorways.
Like his well-known feathered-friend-image-painting counterpart, John James Autobahn's one big regret about his work was that he was obliged to bring to a stop and park each of the speedy cars that he "captured on canvas", so that said "subject" vehicle would stay still for him to scrutinize its minute features and reproduce them with his pigments. John was famously known as"the boy who hated garages" --- he felt that these man-made and "confining" monstrosities were all so hideously ugly, and that the fast and nimble "light on their wheels" vehicles he loved were so much more beautiful and delightful to observe when they were out roaming and racing about, just as free as the air they passed through.
When you order Jimmy John's and try to masturbate before they deliver your sandwich to the door.
I lost the Jimmy John's challenge again yesterday. Twice in a row I answered the door with a boner.
The coolest person in the world so he has a dictionary
Violenter doesn’t exist in John’s dictionary
John and Kylee are the perfect people for eachother! If you’re a John and you find a Kylee, make her yours, she is everything you need and want, even if you don’t completely understand it. Remember all of those times she made you smile, and all of those times she reassured you, SHE CARES ABOUT YOU LIKE NO OTHER PERSON WILL! Make her yours before you lose her, if she’s not yours already, you’re gonna lose her if you don’t tell her how you feel! If you think you’re in love with another, but this definition made you think about Kylee, even a little bit, HURRY UP BEFORE YOU LOSE THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER HAPPEN TO YOU!
Best friend 1: “WOW, John and Kylee are finally together!”
Best friend 2: “Took them long enough.”
The action of a man making finger guns with both hands durring doggystyle; then inserting both pointer and index fingers the woman's vagina on both sides of his penis, followed by inserting both thumbs in her ass. Commonly done when the man wants to feel a tighter hole.
I fucked the shit out of Jessica last night, but she was pretty loose so I had to give her the ole John Wicking.