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A term coined by an aspien from Virginia were it is a low functioning special ed individual that weighs over 400lbs were if dropped it will contaminate an entire building depending on how many lbs with a form of radiation known as retardation
if exposed to will render any saidsaid individual in the vicinity retarded
guy 1 did you hear that 500lb tard nuke that farted in the special ed class the other day??
guy 2 yeah i got a notification on my phone about a gas leak at school from an unknown origin and i heard the hazmat team had to respond
guy 1 i can imagine the entire school got contaminated with retardation
In the farewell stage of an exchange of greetings and/or pleasantries, a 'you-tard' occurs when one party replies "you too!" when it does not apply.
Waiter says "Enjoy your meal" , you reply " you, too! A you-tard has occurred.
Tard Tax: An official tax on "retards". A retard shall defined as A) a person who acts retarded and jackass like. B) a person lacking logical and critical thinking to come to a logical conclusion. C) One who lacks the ability to examine ALL the facts in front of them and realise they have been lied to.
Self explanatory....The more of a tard a person is the more tax shall be imposed on them.
1) "Hey guess what??...Congress thinks the American people are not awake and may impose a tard tax on them".
2) "Ladies and gentlemen of the Senate and House...since the American people are asleep and we can basically rape and plunder, how much of a tard tax shall we impose on the American people??"
adj. the inability to use t9 (predictive text). t9 was designed to make typing text messages easier; however, the user must be smarter than the phone for feature to work properly. t-tardedness is enhanced with alcohol consumption.
"dude - do you ever read your nonsense texts before pressing the send button? you're totally t-tarded!"
1. An otherwise seemingly normal acquiantance whose thought process has obviously been clouded by copious and/or regular alcohol consumption, to the point where their normal personality seems to have been negatively affected, even during brief periods of sobriety. ~Often detected by unusually frequent bouts of making a complete ass of ones self and may be accompanied with foul odors.
2. Someone who may already have, or an insinuated suspicion that they may be dangerously close to having a diagnosable problem with alcohol.
3. Term for a person whose apparent alcohol intoxication seemed cause for a particularly unusual incident of stupid behavior.
James: "Was that weird or what last night when Steve took his pants off in the middle of the neighborhood BBQ?"
James' wife: "Yea, we definately need to put out an alca-tard alert."
alcoholic alcoholism
A person in the color gaurd who over exaggerates being in color gaurd and can't stand to talk about anything but color gaurd. They will often have a profile picture of them in their uniform and won't stop talking about the difficulties of color gaurd when really it's just a place for girls who weren't talented enough to be on the cheer or poms team.
Madison: "Hey do you know Julie?"
Peter: "yeah she's a total color tard and won't shut up about it."
Trying to get your point across by repeating the same thing over and over again in a retarded loop. Attempting to change the outcome. This is typically in a customer service setting where the loop-ee can do very little to aid the looper.
The following is a Tard Loop:
Tard: "I would like an apple please"
Clerk: "I'm sorry, we are out of apples, we will have more tomorrow. Would you like something else?"
Tard: "I really need an apple, I haven't had an apple all day."
Clerk: "I'm sorry..."
Tard: "I was really counting on having an apple, I like them"
Clerk: "I'm sorry,we'll have some by 8am"
Tard: "But I enjoy apples, I've eaten an apple every day since Nam"
Clerk: "....sorry... would you like an orange"
Tard: "I'm just disappointed, apple aaappleeeee."