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When a man is denied sex by a woman in the morning after waking up, when she goes back to sleep, you lay a used condom over her upper lip and leave.
Bob: That slut Jenny wouldn't do me when we woke up so I gave that bitch the trojan mustache.
Tom: Damn straight, bitch had it comin'!
When a lady shaves her nether regions besides her lips
Guy 1: how’d your date with Stephanie go last night?
Guy 2: ehh, I was about to go down on her, but she had a dirty mustache and it turned me off
When you ejaculate into your sexual partners mouth and it comes back out their nose.
You look great wearing that Miami Mustache babe! I gave her a Miami Mustache, I ate a bag of celery and filled her mouth so full it came back out her nose!
When you want to sit on someone's face or would like to.
I'm vladimir putin's mustache warmer.
I want to be your mustache warmer.
While most hens don't have a hairy beak this rare occurance happens when chickens have been exposed too much genetically modified organisms in their feed.
Also a varient on the Dirty Sanchez where you replace fecal matter with egg yolks.
You can't give her a Hen Mustache without breaking a few eggs.
Noun: The leftover vaginal secretion above the upper lip after oral sex. This resembles the "Got Milk" mustaches, though it is a mustache from pussy juice.
Bro 1: "Dude, I ate her out like it was my lunch!"
Bro 2: "I can tell by your pussy mustache."
A seemingly innocuous app-driven cab ride from a private vehicle emblazoned with a large pink mustache on the grille, sometimes involving minor parked detours allowing passengers, generally female, to sit astride the driver, generally handsome and customer service-oriented, for some quicky cunnilingous.
I was meeting my man at a bar downtown and caught a ride in one of those cabs with the pink mustache. The driver was so fun, I asked, shyly, if I could ride the mustache.
I smiled all through dinner.