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A type of non grape wine, developed in Swedish porn in the 70's whereby Redheaded Swedish women on their menstrual cycle use pure cotton instead of sanitary pads, this is harvested daily by Santa's elves in their off-season as she sleeps, then hand squeezed and bottled at the source, creating a unique taste to each bottle. Redheaded is a key component to this wine, as it gives it the Fire. Blonds with herpes can often be a substitute in cheaper imitations.
Aww bro, I just awoke and my mouth tastes like I've been drinking Swedish Fire Wine all night.
The Swedish snot fest is when you sneeze on each other's naked bodies and procces to slap your bodies together then after you smack your head against a wall until you bleed thenshit down your partners chest.
Me and my partner totally Swedish snot fested last night!
Sweet bro I'm jealous.
A bomb shot beverage.
Ingredients:
1 shot of Jeppson’s Malört
8.4 fl.oz. Red Bull (or energy drink)
16 fl.oz. can of Old style as garnish
Instructions:
Pour a can of Red Bull into a pint glass
Pour a shot of Jeppson’s Malört into a shot glass
Drop the shot into the Red Bull right before drinking
Enjoy
Me: This is cause for a celebration; Swedish Nail Bombs for the whole table!
Friend: Eww I don’t like Malört
Me: Fuck you
John and I played a game of swedish finger traps last night.
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"Swedish Friday on the Rocks" is a procedure with intricate sexual acts on which the male and the female perform grotesque and vile tasks during sexual intercourse. The first act will be drinking 1-2 liters of water (may be tap, compacted, toilet, etc.) and waiting 2-4 hours for the urination process to commence. During this time, the female has the optional opportunity to purchase a nose plug or another type of plug. The female may use other commonplace objects (such as a cork, a rubber stopper, etc.). Once the urination process begins, the male plays the role of the "urinator", in which he controls all of his urine to curve its trajectory, thereby landing snuggly into the nostril(s) of the female, or the "urinatee".
Once the urination is finished, the female holds her head and neck backwards (65°-90°) while the male stands (either on or off the bed), masturbating until stopping to ejaculation. While the male ejaculates, he attempts to land all of his ejaculate into the female's navel, AKA the "belly button". After landing his ejaculation, the female must then carefully and confidently transfer the urine flown into her nostril earlier, and into the female navel. The male must then obtain a cup or glass. The origination of "Swedish Friday on the Rocks" suggested by Swedish paupers and now Swedish millionaires, recommends that the male should obtain a shot glass that holds 0.5-1 oz.
For our conception, I think we'll just do Swedish Friday on the Rocks.
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This involves building a large pile of faeces, over a period of months, keeping it stored in a cool, dry place to esnure maximum conservation. One should then invite their partner over for a 'romantic dinner'. Following this, an invitation to Moris Dance. Whilst dancing force them into the cupboard and rub their face in the excrement. Then lock the cupboard, and proceed to ejaculate on the door handle, mixing it with superglue. Then proceed to sing the swedish national anthem until she can get out of the cupboard. Upon exiting her hand will become glued to the door handle, and mixed with the giz. Then shit on her feet and invite a swedish man over to regail her with a tale of the old country of sweden.
Last night I gave some girl with one leg The Swedish Moris Dance. She called the police and I'm facing 3 years in jail.
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For females: When giving oral sex you suck on his testicles and rub his shaft until just before completion. Then you chomp on his nuts so that he yells, "Yodely, yodely, yodely-hi-hoo!"
This chick was giving me awesome dome until I got the swedish ball drop. I'll never make that mistake again.
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