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a story written to make people horny. btw, when men were hanged, they would get a boner.
i hope you get as horny reading this as i did writing it, the night after i was proposed to.
insert sex story here:
after what seemed like hours, h and Emma were finally home. they had been dating for a few yrs, and had been living together for 5 moths now. he had a surprise for her. after showering he slipped into their room without her noticing. they were both in the nude. he tapped her on the shoulder. "will you marry me?" she was silent for a moment, but then threw herself onto him, arms wrapping around him. she started to kiss his cheek. he made a trail of kisses along her jawbone to her mouth. "oh jules, please! i will marry you!" she whispered. "can i?" "of course" he pulled away from her and pulled down their towels. they tangeled in each other, light touches urging the other. they started kissing first, but he loved emma so much, it hurt to continue like this. he paused. "go on. please" slowly, he put his cock into her pussy. she moaned and started squirming. "its ok, j, im on the pill" he started humping her, slowly first, but her moans made him hard and he went faster. he pulled out and she started sucking his schlong. he couldn't stop his moans. he pulled his cock out and started kissing her. her tits rubbed against his chest, and it sent a tingle all the way down to his groin. they were moaning into eachother, the pleasure they gave eachother mirrored thousandfold. eventually they stopped kissing and he started to drift off to sleep. the last thing he heard before he fell asleep was "te amo, jules. te amo, te amo, te amo."
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one of my favorite bands ever, i think its pretty funny how they mention death in a large majority of their songs, lol
they play my favorite song of all time "In The Shadows"
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Sex story
Lisa was really horny so she went to a bar and looked for a man to fuck that night. She found a man by the side of the bar.
"Hey big boy" she said
" come with me because i know where this is going " he replied
he brought her to a limo outside in the alley. They went in and he said " if you need anything from me, my name is randy"
"Ok" Lisa said seductively
They both began to strip and then started to French kiss. He fingered her perfect vrgina and and she gave randy a hand job. She started to moan " just fuck me already!" After she said that randy shoved his dick, his 7" hard dick in her pussy and she yelled out " YES YES HARDER FASTER WAIT LET ME SUCK IT!" he moved her of so she can suck it and she sucked it like a lollipop. Then they put themselves in the very familiar 69 position and then a man and woman came in and said that they were horny. So the new woman(marry) sucked randy's dick and the new guy (Marvin) fucked her in the ass. Lisa was pleasuring her self in the Vrgina and marvin stuck a Dilldo in her ass.
They all toke a brake then continued to go on until they could not no more.
Then the men masturbated to the women eating each others pussy. Then they all comes and everyone ate each others cum. At the end, everyone was wet and making out... with each others private parts for hours and hours.
The End
115👍 135👎
A fairly short to medium length story with basically no plot or point. Originating from Paige, the master of all meaningless stories.
Paige: hey i have this cool story. today i went outside and there was a bunny in the yard. it was eating grass i think. and then it heard the door shut behind me and it hopped away into my crazy neighbor's yard...
Me: what the fuck... that was a paige story.
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*Can only be countered by 'Nuetral Story, ODST'*
Used when someone wants to be extra annoying. After everything someone say about their day, you chime in with a "Sad Story" to convey your true feelings. "Sad Story, Friend" can be used when you and another are being annoying together and irritating the world around you.
Friend #2: ...but I couldn't go poop. And I tried so hard.
Friend #1: Aw, that's a Sad Story, Friend.
Friend #2: Isn't it, Friend? Sad Story!!
Innocent Bystander: Geh *dead*
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A person who tells another individuals story as if it were their own.
Story Stealer: "Did I tell you about that time when I fucked the midget from the bowling alley?"
Original Storyteller: "I was the one who fucked the midget from the bowling alley, you fucking story stealer"
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A story with an elaborate explanation about how something relatively simple happened to you.
Guy on youtube tells the blister story of how he got his foot blister by having to use his left sock as a toilet paper substitute in a Thai public toilet.
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