front door neighbor

The person who lives across the street from your house.

Alex: Who's that?
Luiza:That's my front door neighbor!

12👍 3👎

front shelf disease

the inability to see something right in front of you

-where the hell is the peanut butter?
-right in front of you
-FUCK front shelf disease

12👍 2👎

front-runner fan

Someone who never stays true to the same teams. They're always fans of the best teams.

Ryan: Man I love watching my teams dominate.

Jared: Who are your teams?

Ryan: The Tampa Bay Rays, Boston Celtics, & NY Giants.

Jared: WTF, last year your teams were the Yankees, LA Lakers, & NE Patriots.

Ryan: What can I say, I'm a front-runner fan. The Yankees aren't gonna make the playoffs, the Lakers lost last year in the Finals, & Tom Brady is out for the season.

Jared: This conversation's over.

24👍 6👎

shut the front door

NOT used for S.T.F.U. replacement but for a more light hearted "Get the F* outta here" "I can't believe it" banter used mainly by "valley" type girls.

Vicky:Ohh, I just got this Gucci sweater for only $75.
Cindy: Shut the front door!! that's awsome!

810👍 353👎

Blue-Fronted Amazon

A breed of parrot that stays a chick all it's life.

Woman: Your parrot has been alive for decades. Why does he still sound prepubescent?
Man: Blue-Fronted Amazons never grow up.

8👍 3👎

Fit as front door

Used to describe someone who is incredibly attractive, but without using “fit as fuck” so you can avoid swearing. They usually have incredibly large chocolate tipped flesh mountains and a big fat jiggly back. Tbf usually a filthy fucking slut too.

Helen is fit as front door.

Stanley front loader

Strenuously engaging one's johnson in self-stimulation, especially using a power tool.

Thomas: "Dennis said he would be doing some carpentry work this weekend."
Richard: "Personally, this worries me."
Harrison: "Yes, Dennis is likely to use the stanley front loader."