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No Masturbate March

A month which you can not masturbate, similar to No Nut November

Alan: Y'all ima go home to Masturbate
John: U can't do that it's No Masturbate March
Don't be like alan
Buy a calender

by WhyLolHey2 February 17, 2019

7πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


just masturbating

1. abbreviated to: jm
2. a reference to your current state.

Woman: What are you up to?
Man: Nothin, just masturbating. You?

by Dubby4 November 16, 2010

61πŸ‘ 25πŸ‘Ž


Verbal masturbation

n. (v. Verbally masturbating)
Describes a person using (or trying but fails) extremely flamboyant, overelaborate, pendantic, overembellished, pompus, language seasoned with a lot of jargon from a certain discipline, sometimes to the extent that it has to be translated or deciphered to be intelligible for the common man; done with the unnecessary need to be meticulously accurate when communicating completely mundane things. May be done with the intent of making others feel inferior…and/or himself superior, part of role-playing, humour, being an idiot, (trying to) showing off how smart you are, and as mentioned an unnecessary need to be meticulously accurate. The true verbal masturbators are the pretentious ones who try but utterly fail because they use words they do not understand and use words across a jargon (inconsistency). Verbal masturbation may or may not appear redundant; however the redundancy is from the choice of words used and not necessarily by its meaning. Additionally, some may feel others are verbally masturbating but do so wrongfully because the situation requires being meticulously accurate

Non exhaustive examples of jargon used are:

Scientific: (star trek, professor Frink from The Simpson’s),
Forensic: (CSI, Sherlock Holmes),
Arcane: (old language, medieval, lord of the rings, star wars),
Prose/poetic: (rhymes, poetic symbolic uses etc. of language usually belonging to the literature world)
dictionary: (sounding like one…)
Leet (1337): sounding like a nerd/geek

girl: romeo and juliet was so romantic and such a deep movie
guy: romeo & juliet with leo dicaprio is one big verbal masturbation from start to end. the rhyming is done with so much intensity and pompousness its embarrasing to watch.
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Data: "If you are referring to sexuality, I am... fully functional, programmed in... multiple techniques."
Borg Queen: "How long since you've used them?"
Data: "Eight years, seven months, sixteen days, four minutes, twenty-two seconds..."
(data is verbally masturbating, as he always has)
-----
John cleese: He's not pinin'! he's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! he's expired and gone to meet his maker! he's a stiff! Bereft of life, he rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies! his metabolic processes are now history! He's off the twig! he's kicked the bucket, he's shuffled off his mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! (an excellent example of verbal masturbation used in humour)

by broccolee May 3, 2006

90πŸ‘ 41πŸ‘Ž


masturbation party

Can be a group of all girls, all guys, a mix, whatever. When a group of people get together and one person starts masturbating, and one by one, everyone starts to join in and masturbated until everyone gets off, or the last one to get off just can't do it.

I went to a masturbation party with a bunch of girls, it was crazy. So much moaning and rubbing, and fingering, tits galore. Amazing. It was like Heaven.

by Dave Halliday July 1, 2005

426πŸ‘ 225πŸ‘Ž


Mental Masturbation

Intellectual activity that serves no practical purpose. Excessively theoretical, and therefore a distraction from more practicable matters.

Dr. Richard Dawkins, noted biological theorist, in response to a student's philosophical question about skeptical attitudes towards science and reality, cited the following anecdote:

<paraphrasing>
James Boswell asked, "... nothing really exists unless there's somebody there to see it. How do you refute that?" Samuel Johnson replied, "I refute it thus!", and kicked a stone out of his way.
<\paraphrasing>

Dr. Dawkins, commenting on Boswell's question, and critiquing the attitude: "If you want to mess about with that sort of mental masturbation, thats fine, but, ... but the science of reality is what gets you through the day, ... and makes things work!"

by The Practical Atheist December 12, 2009

143πŸ‘ 68πŸ‘Ž


masturbation material

A woman or man so hot, you want to masturbate!

"Let me tell you something about Sarah Palin, man, she's good masturbation material. The glasses and all of that, great masturbation material" (said comedian Tracy Morgan, January 27, 2011, during "Inside the NBA" on TNT before the Heat-Knicks game).

by masturbationmaterial.com February 1, 2011

18πŸ‘ 5πŸ‘Ž


chronic masturbation

Masturbating frequently everyday, more than 5 times a week.

Honey, I would swear our son is suffering from chronic masturbation. All you ever hear from him these days are slight moans and the sound of pants being unzipped

by Omukae April 10, 2010

295πŸ‘ 156πŸ‘Ž