Random
Source Code
Random
Benjamin Evelyn Waters:
Born: (sometime in the 1800s per his demeanor)
Died: September 27th, 2035
Born in the quaint town of Heidelberg MS Benjamin Evelyn Waters was the proud adopted and abducted son to a family of beavers. Strange as it may sound, Benjamin surely enjoyed his grueling education in his younger years as he learned to stop up the city’s water supply with twigs and dead cats as he used his bodily functions as jet propulsion through the various streams and sewers. He became well known for his skills in sticky things and outlandish sentences, so much so that a community near his town was promptly named in honor of his frequent visits to its meadows where he delivered copious amounts of Benjamin Evelyn Waters seedlings to fellow female beavers.
Benjamin Evelyn Waters pursued his aspirations to leave his primitive ways, and become a great man. Sadly, this did not happen. He did however become a very accomplished literary writer. He is best known for his auto-biography: “The Transgressing Life of a Silent But Deadly Man,” and his renowned poem, “Oh My Weary Soul, Why Hast Thou Fucked Me?”
Not much is known about Benjamin Evelyn Waters middle-age years, as no one cared to record his life events. This, as he would later go on to comment, “ was not anyone’s fucking business anyway.“
Benjamin Evelyn Waters died on Sept 27th, 2035 after farting so violently that his heart burst asunder.
He is survived by his concubine, Desiree, and his son Theodore Relevance Waters
“Here lies Benjamin Evelyn Waters amidst a field of roses.
The gas could not wait, but the strain was too great,
And now he drinks with Moses.”
Best friends became boyfriend and girlfriend
Benjamin and Emily were best friends for over 7 yrs . Guess you could say with benefits too. One day Benjamin told Emily he wanted to be her boyfriend, finally Emily gave Benjamin a shot!
- Spends more than 4 hours each day sitting on the toilet, without removing his pants, with no intention of actually going to the toilet, although for some reason still insists on tearing off dozens of pieces of toilet paper and flushing them as part of his ‘cover’
- Eats warm garbage before coming in to school each morning
- Types with two fingers, as hard as possible
- Rolls over on Classmates whenever anything goes wrong and sits in the middle of the bus
- Occasionally gets caught jerking off in the fire stairwell (weirdo)
- Models his haircut on members from the band ‘bald boys united ’
- Obsessive overuse of the words ‘your mom’ and ‘leo’
- Has no friends
- Bares a striking resemblance to ‘The Hamburgular”
- Stores his semen (from his numerous daily stairwell jerk offs) in Dixie cups, with the intention of one day raising an unholy army of ‘little bennys’ to do his bidding
- Has every moment of tenz twitch stream watched
- Occasionally murders fat Asian children and hides them underneath his bed
Devin: That benjamin ma guy is so good at throwing, right?
Navi: What do you mean? He cant even throw the ball 10 yards!
Devin: I meant "throwing" in valorant.
Navi: OHHHH!!! That makes much more sense!
benjamin hale is a brunette posh boy who lives in a posh house. ben is in love with a a girl named ruby <3
‘omg did you see benjamin hale?’
‘ben is so posh’
A great man, any girl loves him. So does any man
OMG DID YOU SEE BENJAMIN GELB? HES SOOO SEXY AND I WANT TO BAANG HIM
Is usually known as the "funny guy" of a group of people. Is very intelligent ,but often doesn't show it as much as he could. Doesn't give his all in most things in life,but when he does most of the time tops most people.