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The only food options available at the grocery store after mass crowds have cleared shelves amidst COVID-19 pandemic.
Guy1: You been keeping your macros diversified since Coronavirus, bruh?
Guy2: Nah bruh. All I got these days to eat is wheat germ, anchovies and tampons. It’s the Panic Diet.
Guy1: Ouch, that’s painful bruh.
This is when you’re in a ZOOM/video meeting with people you don’t know well (usually during a pandemic) and you’re bored so you want to leave. You don’t really know how to exit gracefully, so you get all anxious and continue to hang out: the “panic lurk”.
My friend just had a Zoom Bday party and I didn’t know anyone.
I was bored and wanted to go, but didn’t want to offend her so I just panic lurked.
When the Satanists panic and start throwing everything against the wall in order to try to distract and cause chaos because somebody somewhere took away something sacred to them.
The dawn of 2020 kicked off the largest, most extended satanic panic of all time.
Satanic panic is a phenomenon where angry old Christian conservatives (also see noncervatives) start clutching their pearls about anything totally harmless bring "evil" or spewing complete nonsense about how the devil is trying to "brainwash" people. Recently started facing a very noticeable resurgence around the time the 2024 Paris Olympics started, where drag queens performed in the opening ceremony (which due to being filmed for a live audience, was totally family friendly).
Naturally, these pissed off old people with no life have taken to standing around all day in the streets throughout many states, holding up signs telling people to more or less convert to Christianity or Catholicism. These 'protests' aren't always peaceful though, as a few instances reported these same people with signs crying Satanic panic, have resorted to attempting to more or less kidnap unattended children or outright trying to grab them from their parents, hinting at these conservatives' more naturally predatory instincts.
If you encounter an instance of Satanic panic, hide your kids and hide your wives/husbands/partners, but most importantly, remember to yell the word Nonce as loud as you can. That way, their Satanic panic will be cured in no time. Worst case scenario, call the authorities, kidnapping is against the law.
If you or someone you know is showing signs or has a history of Satanic panic, seek help today.
Susan: I heard Benjamin ended up on the register last week
Helen: Benjamin?? What did he do?
Susan: The Satanic panic got to him, I heard they found 3 girls dressed in white and tied up in his basement!
Helen: This is getting out of control, I hope he's getting the help he clearly needs
The act of overreacting so much to a minor situation that you have to masturbate to alleviate stress.
Man, I discovered I needed new shoes and got so flustered I needed to panic fap it out
Freaking out after an exam, thinking you did badly, that you immediately drop the class, only to regret it after.
I didn't realize there was a back to the exam until after I left, so I ran to my advisor and ended up panic dropping the class.
1) a phrase describing the adrenaline-fueled parkour champion-like moves no one, including you, ever knew you had, in an emergency situation. For instance:
Picture, if you will, an indoor play structure at a nursery school/day care. I'd wondered before how the grown ups were supposed to get in there if there was ever a kid inside that needed help. Then one day, one of the tiny tots bit another one real good, right inside the play structure.
I moved so fast that before I knew it I was inside the stupid thing with a screaming toddler in my arms, and no clear recollection of how I'd gotten there. I have a vague recollection of backing into it, somehow. The other toddler looked me dead in the eye and told me, very confidentially, "I bite."
YES, I THINK WE'VE ESTABLISHED THAT
2) possible reference to "Panic Parkour", a set of hott trax laid down by Urban Action, Dubstep & Chill
I don't like extreme sports or cross fit. However, show me a kid or animal in danger and my panic parkour moves will inspire awe.