Random
Source Code

Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration

"If you leave your vehicle's engine running during a delay in proceeding (traffic-jam, road construction, accident-resolution, "stuck" red signal-light, etc.), you will be sitting there for many minutes, just wasting gas. The instant you turn the key off and climb out of your seat to stretch, however, THAT'S when the line of traffic will begin moving again, and thus you will have shut off your engine "for nothing", AND you will now be holding up everyone behind you while you hastily hop back into the driver's seat and re-start the engine so that you can move forward again."

I finally took da plunge and bought a second-hand Toyota Prius because I'd eventually had one too many cases of Murphy's Law of Engine-Idling Duration... the Prius automatically shuts down its power during stand-stills, and then uses its electric motor to provide instant mobility as soon as you're ready to go again.

by QuacksO October 21, 2018


Murphy squirts

Diarrhea at the absolute worst time possible.

"I'm on a first date, hottest girl I've ever gone out with, we go back to her place to fuck, and just as I'm about to cum I get the Murphy squirts. Painted a path from her bed all the way to the toilet. I guess she didn't see the humor in it, cuz she didn't want a second date..."

by Bottom-feeder Beater February 18, 2022


Murphy's Law of Gambling

"You can patronize the slots till Doomsday or buy any number of scratch-off tickets and never gain any significant winnings, but then just as soon as you stop playing, the very next player will win big."

Many an addicted gamer believes in Murphy's Law of Gambling, even though it is indeed :"all chance" and thus seldom actually works out that way.

by QuacksO September 12, 2019


Taylah Murphy

taylah murphy could be described as a tryhard, wannabe, stupid, dumb bitch, not-really-but-tries-to-be-slut. nobody REALLY likes her and shes literally the most annoying fucking person ever. leaving hate comments on little girls tryhard youtube video is the only heroic thing she has ever done.

Holly: OMG did . you see taylah murphy she needs to get her face fixed
Taylah's Mum: i know right i lowkey hate her

by T-fizzle dawg October 16, 2018


A Murphy

Winning the cumulative prize in a work office pool while claiming to only be a porn fluffer during college for the money. Is best known from the Buns of Steel videos. Sings impromptu lyrics to Beast of Burden chorus by The Rolling Stones like a champion.

Did you hear about the guy at work that won? He pulled A Murphy.

by Fat Brown Pandas October 29, 2018


Murphy's Law of Bolt-Loosening

"You can heave and strain on da wrench till Doomsday and never get a stubborn bolt loosened, but then just as soon as you ask a stronger --- and probably very busy himself --- person to come and help, DAT'S when da blasted bolt actually WILL yield, either when you give a final demonstrative yank on da wrench to show da second person how supposedly stuck da bolt is, or when he himself hauls back on da wrench and said previously-cranky bolt unscrews with little effort on his part, indicating dat your OWN last tug actually HAD cracked it free after all, and so if you had 'just given it one more go' yourself, you actually COULD have gotten da bolt out on your own, without having to interrupt your now-ears-smokingly-annoyed-at-being-needlessly-called-away colleague in da first place."

I wonder if da inventor of da impact wrench had originally felt prompted to do so due to his having frequently encountered Murphy's Law of Bolt-Loosening???

by QuacksO February 14, 2023


brett murphy

Brett Murphy is another word for someone who goes on corn hub all day

Yo man, stop being a Brett Murphy.

by Cornhub user 42069 April 30, 2016