Bird Tax

Proper social etiquette among parrots is to eat all meals with their flock. "Bird tax" is the portion of every meal eaten within earshot of your parrot. It must be paid to your parrot at the start of said meal as reimbursement for removing your parrot from the wild, or else it will be forcibly collected.*

*Also applies to some budgies and other household birds; this bird law sometimes extends to wild birds living near restaurants and picnic sites, though the legality/enforceability in those situations is questionable.

"Your bird just stole a piece of my blueberry waffle!"

"Don't be rude! My bird doesn't steal! She collects bird tax. Everyone who eats in our home is considered flock and must pay bird tax."

"Why?"

"It's bird law."

Bird "Look at me. Look at me. I'm the captain now." (Squawk translation).

thats a tax

When you get punched

Hey do you have my money that you owe me? Nah man. Nah thats a tax

weeb tax

The extra price you pay for being for being a fucking weeb. Usually because weeaboos drive up demand.

Particularly used in videogames.

- Did you see the katana prices?! They're way too high!
- The weeb tax is real...

tax flu

A term referring to an imaginary illness; when someone receives their income tax refund and they decide to call in sick to their employer so they can spend that money.

Ben went to H&R Block yesterday and they gave him an advance on his income tax refund, so of course he called in sick today with the tax flu.

mall tax

The higher price you pay for an item at a mall versus a big box retailer or online

"I needed a new coffee maker, but Target was sold out of the Cuisinart, so I had no choice but to go to Sears and pay the Mall Tax."

zombie tax

Complacency tax. A tax on anything which we all know is clearly bad for the environment or our health.

Zombie taxes are special taxes on things like tobacco. Taxes on plastic bottles. Taxes on processed food and soft drinks. Taxes on cars that get low mileage.

douche tax

The inflated cost of an item due to it being sold in a particularly affluent or corporate location.

That sandwich I bought at lunch was way overpriced.

Yeah, it's the douche tax from working downtown.