Turtle Shit

Used to describe something that is both amazingly awesome, and amazingly bad. (because turtles are amazingly awesome, and shit is amazingly bad)

John: "what did you think of the movie?"

Jim: "I thought it was turtle shit, I just can't hate it"

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Turtle Party

An Afrikaans saying which means that you should bring your own alcohol to the party. A turtle has a shell. In Afrikaans a "shell" is a "dop". Another meaning for "dop" in Afrikaans is "alcohol".

You're invited to a turtle party... Bring jou eie dop...

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Turtle Head

Senate Minority Leader, Mitch McConnell

Senate Minority Leader, Mitch McConnell, aka "Turtle Head", poked out momentarily from intense deliberations with Senate Democrats, to announce that a budget deal had yet to be reached.

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turtle waxer

a guy with a bald head

hey girl look at that turtle waxer

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turtle head

a shit that knocks at your underpants.

i was pulled over for speeding and tried to explain that there was a turtle head bashing my underpants but the officer still booked me.

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pokin' turtle

the last minute right before you have to poop, and your poop is poking and in out of your butt

damn girl, looks like you got a pokin' turtle!

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Decapitate the turtle

when you are turtle heading, or plain taking a dookie, and you "cut loose" the protruding mass of excrement by clenching your sphincter tight mid turd

"damnd that was a long crap, i had to decapitate the turtle before it touched the water"

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