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The lamentable offspring of douche bags.
There was a douche-bag in a hummer that cut me off the other day. His douche bubbles waved at me from the back seat.
Similar to the concept of drunk dialing, douche dialing is the act of receiving an annoying and unwanted phone call or text message from a complete douche or douche bag. Similar to drunk dialing, douche dialing often involves irritating and repeated phone calls from ex-boyfriends or overly pompous guys trying to score dates with unreceptive girls. However, unlike drunk dialing, douche dialing does not necessarily have to take place late at night. Douche bags can dial phones at any hour.
Last night, I got douche dialed by that complete douchebag, Dan. This is the third time this week he's douche dialed me. Can't he get the picture that I'm not going to go out with him?
A gentle reproach to someone tone down their douchery.
"Douche it down, bro! You're coming on too strong here"
"You know Bartholomew, you really need to douche it down"
"What's the problem here, why don't y'all douche the fuck down?!"
The one person in the family who always lets you down and is generally an AHole.
Me: Hey thanks for the golf ball for Christmas.
Uncle Douche: I didn't know what to buy you ill get you back
Me: alright( sounds reasonable)
Situation: 6 months later nothing...3 years later nothing...at his funeral gave him back his golf ball.
when you see a guy and you've never actually met him but you get the strong sense that he is a complete douche bag.
Kevin Federline, radiates major douche vibes, need I provide further examples?
Douche-Titan: An individual, male or female that exudes above average douche-bag qualities.
Person A – Did you hear about that guy that pooped in B’s litter box after her Halloween party?
Person B - Yeah, what a douche-titan!
When a women is crouching/squatting in the tub naked facing the faucet with it running. She then repeadetly catches water in her hands and hand over hand begins tossing it into her vagina in hopes to extract male sperm (cum) out of her. The motion similar to that of a monkey throwing there feces hand over hand over there shoulders. (Yet in the situations one hand at a time and into there vagina)
Male: Hey hunny I hear the shower running. Coming in to join you. hehehe
Female: (not responding/did not hear)
Male: (sneaks in and sees her in tub) Um hey...
Female: GET OUT OF HERE!!
Male: Did I just catch you doing a Monkey Douche