The lamentable offspring of douche bags.
There was a douche-bag in a hummer that cut me off the other day. His douche bubbles waved at me from the back seat.
The one person in the family who always lets you down and is generally an AHole.
Me: Hey thanks for the golf ball for Christmas.
Uncle Douche: I didn't know what to buy you ill get you back
Me: alright( sounds reasonable)
Situation: 6 months later nothing...3 years later nothing...at his funeral gave him back his golf ball.
A gentle reproach to someone tone down their douchery.
"Douche it down, bro! You're coming on too strong here"
"You know Bartholomew, you really need to douche it down"
"What's the problem here, why don't y'all douche the fuck down?!"
when you see a guy and you've never actually met him but you get the strong sense that he is a complete douche bag.
Kevin Federline, radiates major douche vibes, need I provide further examples?
Douche-Titan: An individual, male or female that exudes above average douche-bag qualities.
Person A – Did you hear about that guy that pooped in B’s litter box after her Halloween party?
Person B - Yeah, what a douche-titan!
When a women is crouching/squatting in the tub naked facing the faucet with it running. She then repeadetly catches water in her hands and hand over hand begins tossing it into her vagina in hopes to extract male sperm (cum) out of her. The motion similar to that of a monkey throwing there feces hand over hand over there shoulders. (Yet in the situations one hand at a time and into there vagina)
Male: Hey hunny I hear the shower running. Coming in to join you. hehehe
Female: (not responding/did not hear)
Male: (sneaks in and sees her in tub) Um hey...
Female: GET OUT OF HERE!!
Male: Did I just catch you doing a Monkey Douche
1. Any person at an ice rink who attempts to show off, without doing anything show-off-worthy (see examples below).
2. At an ice rink, the person who, instead of doing their job as a guard, skates around in a douche-like manner to prove they're better than everyone else.
3.Any person at an ice-rink who shows off by: skating really fast, skating really fast and then skidding, resulting in sheets of ice spraying on innocent by-skaters.
1. Person- "Hey, my child is really afraid to skate, can you bring him a walker to help him out?"
Ice Douche- "Ah, nah. I'm too busy showing off to actually do the job I'm being paid for." (Skates off douchily)
2. Person A- "Hey, havin fun?"
Person B- "No, I almost got ran over by that ice douche over there."
3. Person A- "Hey, Ice Douche, could you do a triple axle for us?"
Ice Douche- "Umm, yeah, after the ice is cleared" (Ice is cleared and still doesn't do triple axle).