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Random
Something that doesn’t make sense. I.e how the paper towel Companies are always trying sell you less rolls but tell You it’s more rolls. For instance Bounty 6 pack but the package says it’s really 12rolls.
Lance said he was going to send me a screenshot of his cracked screen…clearly he is doing Paper Towel Math because you can’t screenshot the crack on your screen 🤦🏾 ♀️
When someone shames you for walking around in a towel
Shayna: "Kathleen would you get out of that towel? People are coming."
Kathleen: "God Shayna you don't have to towel shame everyone."
A towel used to absorb bodily fluids during sex.
Bonus points if there’s blood AND cum on it.
“Ah fuck, my roommate found the no-no towel.” - John
“Don’t worry man Derek is chill. He probably just threw it in the wash” - Jake
A pretty girl that will hold your towel while you are out surfing.
Jenny wasn’t pretty enough to be a towel holder. She knew she was strictly an off-season girlfriend.
When you leave a giant wet spot on the bed, but you just want to go to sleep you can use a handmaid's towel to soak up the mess. Alternatively, you can put down the handmaid's towel before you fuck to keep your filthy cum off the sheets.
Honey, you blew the stew all over my side of the bed. Can you grab me a handmaid's towel while you are in the bathroom?
A corny expression used (often by fathers) when experiencing discomfort or discouragement. A substitute phrase for "son of a bitch". used in situations where swearing is not suitable.
Drops Beer "Son of a tea towel"