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Silly ah Goofy ah truth

The belief in which following Silly ah Goofy ah truth you will gain true peace and will then learn the truth and all problems will be solved as you ascend to the great Silly ah Goofy ah heavens above.

Do you believe in Silly ah Goofy ah truth?

by BIGTONKABURGER June 7, 2022


“The truth shall set you free”

Actually, this saying is ITSELF one of the LEAST “true” statements of all time… as we are all too painfully aware, “coming clean” to the powers-that-be (i.e., parents, teachers, policemen, etc.) seldom if ever actually gains or maintains your “freedom”; in fact, usually the **exact opposite** occurs whenever you bravely/penitently reveal your shameful secrets like this --- rather than their extending any significant “charity” (i.e., mercy or forgiveness) to you in response to your trustingly/naively-admitted revelations of past transgressions, these hypocritical and out-of-touch-with-reality sadists generally do everything they can to CURTAIL your freedom and otherwise make you as miserable as possible, such as giving you an extended time-out, grounding you for an outrageously-long period, making you stay in from recess, throwing you in the slammer for a few days, and so on. So unless there is some serious injustice that your silence is maintaining (such as that an innocent person is being blamed/punished for something that you did), it’s usually wise to follow Will Roger’s advice to “never pass up a good chance to shut up”… contrary to what these authority-figures may try to assure you, they generally do **not** “have your best interests at heart”… about all they actually wanna do is try to soothe their **own** perpetually-gnawing consciences by being overly hard on anyone under their care!

My conscience was pricking me after hearing the local minister preaching about “the truth shall set you free”, and so like the total dumba** that I am, I went to the police station and admitted to the desk-sergeant about my having swiped a few candy-bars and a couple bottles of soda from the local Circle-K over the past six months; rather than just smiling and praising me for “being a good boy” to be so honest, though, the officer merely slapped da cuffs on me and made me cool my heels in jail for 48 hours! Talk about a letdown --- he didn’t even seem to care about my protests that he was blatantly going against what the preacher had just said was supposed to happen when we admit our sins! I think I’ll sue that minister for misrepresentation and deceitful speech --- I shoulda merely kept my big mouth shut, just as I always have in the past regarding stuff like this! And then he wonders why he has such a hard time gaining or keeping church-members!

by QuacksO November 25, 2018

9👍 2👎


this is my truth tell me yours

a cool ablum made by a cool band

they fucking rule

by VMC August 30, 2003

7👍 25👎


The truth about what makes Japan so great

Japan and America/Britain are an opposing positive field, meaning that both cultures are fascinated with each other, such as Beckham in Tokyo, or Nintendo. Japan is just like any other place, so i dont feel that i should think of the people any differently, or that they're better or worse.

They're just like you and me.

By the way, using chopsticks is such a pain. i dont know how asian toddlers can do it but i can't!

by Biafra J October 7, 2004

17👍 24👎


I always tell the truth. Even when I lie.

Quote from the movie Scarface.

It's a matter of perspectives, and that there's truth in the way of things. When you lie, you also tell the truth because that lie is real because the truth is real, the truth being false, would make the lie true.

You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don't have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth. Even when I lie.

by Bona27 February 27, 2010

156👍 42👎


The truth will set you free but first it’ll piss you off

In the end it’s better to tell the truth despite what happens because at least you won’t have that burden.

“How am I gonna tell my mom I crashed her truck? She'll kill me!”

“Listen the truth will set you free but first it’ll piss you off. That’s apart of life.”

by Joshlerandmel February 18, 2019

6👍 5👎


My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gigoogity that girl. I geschmoigiddied her geflavaty with my googus, and I am sorry

My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did creampie that girl. I impregnated her fetus with my sperm, and I am sorry.

Quagmire: My fellow Americans, I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gigoogity that girl. I geschmoigiddied her geflavaty with my googus, and I am sorry.
Meg: What does that mean?
Peter: Shut up, Meg.
Stewie: Brian, what DOES this mean?
Brian: It means Quagmire was having sex with a pregnant woman and she made him come so hard he accidentally impregnated her fetus.
Lois: Uh, that's terrible!
Chris: That's not as bad as what the evil monkey does to me at night.

by iamawaitingdeath March 9, 2023

2👍 1👎