Noble beast, known for saving men from avalanches and giving excellent legal advice.
โAs your attorney, I advise you to accept the plea bargain. My fee is twenty pounds of Eukanuba.โ โA St. Bernard.
18๐ 2๐
An American hero, defended himself on a New York City subway by shooting four criminal teenage negroes that were trying to rob and assault him with sharpened screwdrivers.
Bernard Goetz should have been given a medal for shooting up those turd skinned shit-wits, they all had extensive criminal records. At least he paralyzed one of them for life hahahahahahaha.
175๐ 53๐
When two people are making out and come apart for air and their sticky slimy slobber stays stuck together and they suck it right back in after getting air.
Someone needs to throw ice on the two St. Bernarding over there. Ewww gross did you see them suck their slobber back in?
A washed up has been who believes their own bullshit
Oh look there goes a "Mike Bernard" struting down the gutter.
12๐ 2๐
What you say to somebody when something unfortunate happens to them.
When you just lost your cab fare home down the toilet.
or
You've just spilled a whole drink on your packet of fags.
you say gutted bernard in a loud annoying voice
15๐ 3๐
When you bang a girl in her ass and while it's gaping you take a shit in it. Similar to a Monroe Transfer butt a little more personal...
While banging Tara in her ass, I suddenly got the urge to take a shit, so I did what any guy would do in that situation - I pulled out, noticed that her asshole was gaping, went Butt to Butt, and proceeded to shit in her ass. While taking this dump it occured to me this is - "The Gaping Bernard."
17๐ 4๐
A nice, friendly , intelligent guy with huge amounts of knowledge of English. He have many friends, loves Egypt and is going to be an astronaut by his fortune teller.
Mr Bernard is cool and loves space and astronomy