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When u used to be a hoe but now u aren’t single but u still talk about hella snacks because your a retired hoe
Damn Edith be fucking will but she still talks about hella guys cuz she a retired hoe
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Old retired guys who have too much time on their hands.
They are characterized by a lack of patience, which is surprising considering the fact that they probably have nothing better to do than watch Family Fued.
Quite often they start their own blog.
Retired Geezers are the guys with the little change purse in their pockets, who insist on counting out the exact change in the checkout line ahead of me. Usually they get it wrong or don't have the correct amount.
"Dude, that's what they pay the Clerks to do".
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Someone that no longer smokes pot but still lives the way a stoner would
That dude over there...he's a retired stoner he looks walks talks and acts like one but he hasn't smoked for years
When you're boss tells you that you are fired at their retirement party. It of course holds no ground because they no longer have any authority over you. It is usually a power trip done to try to convince themself that they are not getting old and that they can still boss people around (not including grandchildren).
"Hey Jim, I heard that Janice fired you last night at her retirement party."
"No, she retire-fired me. She's just trying to convince herself that she is still in charge."
The goatee you grow after you finally retire for the rest of your life. Men known to have done this include Jim Leyland and Shaq
Man, I worked in a factory for 40 years. I can't wait to retire and grow out my retirement goatee
The spouse of a retired service member that still remains as an integral part of the Dependa Online Community.
This dependa typically considers themselves a “professional dependa”, even though they often haven’t stepped couch surfed with a hand on the phone with the other hand in the bag of Doritos since retirement.
Retired dependa: As a professional spouse (dependa), you should listen to me instead of complaining about (fill in the blank) and learn to appreciate your Jody.
A person who looks like a past or veteran surfer but in actuality doesn’t even go to the beach but just has the typical appearances of such a person (e.g., aged, blond hair streaks, tanned, possibly a mullet, unkempt curly blond hair, surfy sunnies like oaklies; wears boardies, t shirt and thongs).
Aussie friend gets a blond hair make over.
Me: Mate, you look like a bogan or a retired surfie, can’t tell which one’s worse! You don’t even know how to swim!