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The worst type of fail possible.
-"Success! I know have enough money for petrol!"
-"Really? What did you do?"
-"I sold my car!"
-"...catastrophic organ fail."
A CONDITION THAT LONELY MEN AND WOMEN HAVE AFTER HAVING BEEN DUMPED BY THEIR MATES, WITH NO HOPE OF LOVING OR BEING LOVED; A FEELING OF LOVELESSNESS; A LONGING TO HOLD YOUR FUTURE MATE IN YOUR ARMS, ONLY TO REALIZE THIS WILL NOT HAPPEN.
JOHN DOE HAD A **CATASTROPHIC EMOTIONAL APOCALYPSE** AFTER BEING DUMPED BY **THE MAN OF HIS LIFE!!**
The rapid spread of ignorance of the correct rules for apostrophe usage; the widespread misuse of apostrophes, especially in plural nouns.
Walk-in's Welcome; The Miller's invited us to dinner; Washing machine's for sale are all examples of Catastrophic Apostrophic Dysplasia.
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The sudden, unexplainable, transition of wood, metal, plastic, concrete into an explosive state.
Example: OH NOES!! MY DESK IS SUFFERING FROM NONLINEAR CATASTROPHIC STRUCTURAL EXASPERATION!!!
Example: OH NO!! My desk is suffering from nonlinear catastrophic structural exasperation!!!
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The disturbed pervert's equivalent to Russian Roulette, or a more extreme alternative to the game known as Limp Bizkit. A large party event, usually occurring on a Friday, in which five men and five women gather together in an abandoned warehouse. The five men jack off and fill up water balloons with cum. The man who cums last is forced to sit with an 8" dildo up his ass while the five women all shit and piss on him. If he throws up during this time everyone gets to pummel him with the cum balloons.
Person #1: Hey! You wanna celebrate The Collar Catastrophic Cum Carnival tonight?
Person #2: Fuck yeah!
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At sea a problem can accelerate into a crisis at a rate proportional to the conditions
An example of Beare's Law of Accelerating Catastrophe at Sea - BLAC.
Imagine you are at sea and sailing along nicely a few miles off the coast of Corsica. You have the Genoa poled out and are running downwind. You are single handed. You pop down below to make yourself a cup of tea. Everything is fine. All of a sudden the wind shifts and you gybe. The pole slams across the forestay bent; the genoa is backed and the pole is trapped under the sail. As the boat lurches you are scolded with coffee. You rush on deck to sea the wind picking up and the boat floundering.
You are confident you will soon bring things under control. However, the wind is gusting alarmingly. A squawl from the hills. You cannot get the whisker pole off to furl the sail. You look up and in horror you see a ship coming at you dead ahead. The wind gusts and the boat is knocked down. You slip and land hard on deck bruising your arm.
And so it accumulates as you experience Beare's Law of Accelerating Catastrophe at Sea - BLAC.
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I shouldn't have eaten all that breakfast at the buffet table if I don't get to a bathroom fast I'm going to have a Colon Cleansing Catastrophe in my pants