masterbation

its been quite a while since you got some
and you miss that good feeling
so you retreat to bed earlier than usual
take off your clothes
caress yourself, play yourself

until you hit the note
breathing slowly goes down
and you fall asleep piecefully

Do you do masterbation?
No.
(thinks) of course you do

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Management Masterbation

When Management does something purely for their gratification that will produce nothing.

Team building exersizes, employee surveys are just a few examples of management masterbation.

violent masterbation

Masterbating in an extreme manner; associated with shaking, yelling, high speed, and possibly pain.

Josh had the greatest money-shots ever, but he died from too much violent masterbation.

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Masterbation Coma

It happens after a person has masterbated. Mainly happens with guys. The person goes to sleep and wakes up late. Typically if your going to take a nap after masterbating you wont wake up for several hours. They will fall asleep and sleep longer than intended. But of course its a great sleep. Thus the Masterbation Coma.

Steve: Hey, Whats up?

Jon: Nothin.

Steve: Wheres Bob?

Jon: Ehh hes in a Masterbation Coma right now, Lets go with out him.

Steve: Alright.

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Imagination Masterbation

Masterbating using nothing but raw brain power to ensure pleasure while the internet is down or some other excuse!

Yo last night i was using the old technique of Imagination masterbation.... power was down.

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Mirror Masterbation

The act of masterbating to your own reflection.

Tom: I'm so hot I'd masterbate to myself.

Bill: You what?

Tom: Ever heard of Mirror Masterbation?

Bill: No... That sounds nasty.

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female masterbation

The self-stimulation of female genitals. See flicking the bean

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