waiter, bring me water!

The exclamation people make when they give up on something difficult and just take the easy route.

Gah, I can't get a better deal on this car, sigh.. waiter, bring me water!

6👍 9👎

Gay Waiter with a Fashion Sense

In poker jargon, your hole cards being a Queen with a 'Tray' Suited.

I cracked his Pocket Aces with the Gay Waiter with a Fashion Sense.

2👍 3👎

courtesy (waiter laugh or bartender laugh) laugh

when a waiter or bartender is working in a very loud bar or restaurant and cannot completely hear what the customer is saying but they start to laugh when they thought it was a time to insert laughter.
also known as a courtesy laugh when a customer says something at all remotely funny so you use the waiter laugh or bartender laugh to make the customer think they are funny.

I was table-side when the family was talking to me and I started using my "courtesy (waiter laugh or bartender laugh) laugh" when Mr. Young told the same story he has told 45 times previously.

dumb waiter

When someone has hit rock bottom.

“I just got fired and I have nowhere to live.”
“You’re such a dumb waiter.”

One-armed waiter in a wheelchair

A term used to describe slow service in a restaurant or bar

Guest 1: I ordered my food 45 mins ago- how long does it take to make a BLT?
Guest 2: I swear a one-armed waiter in a wheelchair would be faster than this
Guest 1: For sure. Once we get our food let’s dine and ditch

Waiter's Syndrome

When you've been a waiter so long that you inhale every meal you eat, unable to slow down and enjoy the food. This is typically due to repeatedly not getting breaks on long shifts, and having to scoff down a meal in-between tables.

"Ryan, why are you inhaling your burger?"
"I have waiter's syndrome!"

Waiter Weekend

Working as a waiter/waitress (or also commonly referred to as server) allows you to maximize your potential earnings on the traditional weekend (Saturday and Sunday) due to a massive increase in restaurant customers; this is because most people, adults and kids alike, are off from school/work on these days.
Thus it is common practice for a server to work on the days mentioned above.
This results in the common server to get their two days off on days like; Monday and Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, or perhaps even taking working Saturday but not Sunday or Monday, really any consecutive pair of the other 5 days (work-days) in the week.
These two days may be referred to as a “waiter weekend” by a restaurant server (or perhaps any restaurant employee).

Author Note:
~I’ve worked in a quite a few restaurants in my years, some arcade restaurant place, On The Border, Longhorn Steakhouse, and currently Olive Garden (these are the ones I worked at the longest), I’ve heard this used on maybe 8-9 occasions, so it’s not too common, but I like the phrase.

𝐓𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐃𝐀𝐘, 𝟏𝟐:𝟑𝟎𝐏𝐌
𝙾𝙽 𝙿𝙷𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙲𝙰𝙻𝙻
Server 1:
“Hello?”

Server 2:
“What’s up?“

Server 1:
“You coming in to work later?”

Server 2:
“Nah man I’m off today, I’m actually off tomorrow too; it’s my Waiter Weekend.