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excuse merchant

when confronted about the failure of your favorite players to perform , you immediately start making excuses to deflect the blame .

Heckling Fans :"Eli rules!" and "Eli owns your husband,"

Gisele Bundchen :"You have to catch the ball when you're supposed to catch the ball," she said angrily to those around her.

"My husband cannot f--king throw the ball and catch the ball at the same time. I can't believe they dropped the ball so many times."

"The Queen of all excuse merchants "

by krazy836 February 7, 2012


obama excuse

The obama excuse is used when somebody accuses you of racism in a public area like work or something. For example, an employee named Tyrone feels that he was racially harrased by his fat white redneck boss Ermey at walmart.
The obama excuse is best used to get out of situations when someone accuses you of racism like in a traffic stop.

example bellow

Tyrone: "Mr. Ermey, I am done cleaning the bathroom and pushing carts, what would you like me to work on next?"

Ermey: " How about you pick them "cotton" socks boy?"

Tyrone: "what da fuck?"
sometime later
news reporter: A walmart employee is sueing walmart for 5 million dollars in damages due to racist comments and harrasment by a manager.

Lawyer: " By the holly bible of god, Mr. Ermey Are you racist towards black people?"

Ermey: " Not me, I voted for obama!"

Lawyer: "see ,see your honor, my client is not racist he voted for obama, see!!"

greedy lawyer:"The obama excuse saved walmart once agian in court, yea!"

Ermey: " No way, I voted for Obama and he is black!"

by topmountain August 18, 2010

39๐Ÿ‘ 16๐Ÿ‘Ž


excuse me

What you say when you fart. (Britain)

American: Excuse me.
British: -snigger-

by Desmondly November 10, 2008

49๐Ÿ‘ 22๐Ÿ‘Ž


bs excuse

Garbage rationalization one uses for justifying poor decisions, deceit, inadequacy, etc. They are often fallacy in themselves that they have adopted as truth in their own head so that they can have a justification for their own illogical actions. It becomes a form of "truth" to the person owning it and using it. Although convincing to the one utilizing it the rest of the world can see it for what it is..irrational, illogical and often nonsensical. Ironically the creation of it is often more laborious then if the truth itself was just presented but in the users mind this is the best path.

No woman wants a bs excuse for why a man cheated.

by Princess Perception August 26, 2015


Pedo's Excuse

Basically wanting to fuck a anime girl that looks like a toddler but you say it's fine because shes "1000 YeArS oLd"

"Bro why do you want to fuck a literal newborn?"

"It's okay bro, shes actually 500 years old"

"Sounds like a classic case of the pedo's excuse to me, but ok"

by 3zhd April 12, 2021


doctors excuse

A handy printable document that can get you out of life's most horrific situations

"Yo bro -- I need a doctors excuse because I went on a booze binge this weekend and missed three days of school. Know where I can get one?"

"Yeah brah, just hit up bestfakedoctornotes.com and print one out."

by CharlesMacneil July 20, 2013


excuse juice

Any drink used to get a woman drunk enough for sex.

After a few glasses of excuse juice, she'll do just about anything.

by D.M.L January 22, 2008

6๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž