Random
Source Code
Random
1)Someone who:
Has a mortal fear of showers.
Cuts his filthy, puke-inducing toenails right in front of you.
Hawks up phlegm, and then chews it and swallows, around fifty times an day.
Farts around 50 times an hour, and laughs every fucking time, like a fucking moron.
Doesn't even own a fucking toothbrush.
Tells you when he's just masturbated, and describes it in intricate detail.
2)Proof that no god exists.
Paul:Man, I saw your room-mate yesterday. I swear to God I could smell him from 50 yards. How THE FUCK can you live with him?
John: I don't know, I just don't know. I can't go on like this, John! I just can't!
* Starts crying on Paul's shoulder*
Paul: * pats John on the back*
There, there. There there.
A fart among a bunch of horny incarcerated men.
In a jail holding cell:
Man, I gotta cut one.
Dude, keep a tight sphincter. You don't want to be letting out no San Quentin mating call here.
The most perfect line ever said by Chan from stray kids
Stay 1: have you finished the assignment yet?
Stay 2: nahhh, I’ll do that tomorrow..
Stay 1: omg.. like mate stop procrastinating!
44👍 2👎
go heck yourself, if someone says oi mate it means go heck yourself.
3👍 46👎
To shank/stab someone and then say get rekt
Example. Mike walks up to John and stabs John, then says m8 you just got rekt and the Mike walks away, or he says mate ill rek u and then shank him
12👍 1👎
It's Challenging Work.
I can guarantee you won't go hungry, because at the end of the day, someone is always gonna want someone else Dead.
"Sniping's a good job mate." - Sniper TF2
Used to say spread you legs to ladies on club penguin
You: oi mate spread em bitch
Girl: ok mate
21👍 4👎