The Jake

A girl that eats shit and loves eating shit. She doesn't even want anything in return. A girl that just loves the shit.

I was gonna take a fat shit in the toilet, but instead the jake took it all in her mouth.

Does that girl really eat shit? Yea man, she is a total jake.

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Jaking

The act of shaving another man's ass, possibly while they are drunk. Somewhat homoerotic.

So-and-so is famous for jaking people.

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Jaked

Pronounced Jay-kd.
This term generally means abnormally large muscles.

Wow, Hes so jaked. He must be on steriods

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The Jake

N. A Whiny bitch in a group of friends that gets what he considers a girlfriend, but in reality she lives over 1000 miles away and has never seen her in person. And after said "girlfriend" breaks up with him, he whines and cries for days on end till he remembers he only needs his hand so he can at least beat off with it.

Example 1-

Friend 1 : "So how's your ex girlfriend, Jake?"

Jake: "SHUT UP! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND MY PAIN!!!"

Friend 2: "Really? You've never even banged her..."

Example 2- Friend

Friend 1: "Is Jake still crying over that girl?"

Friend2: " No he rediscovered his hand."

The Jake: " I CAN HEAR YOU, YOU KNOW. I'M TAKING YOU OFF MY FRIENDS LIST ON XBOX LIVE NOW! ASSHOLE!!"

*The Jake runs off and cries. Then beats off.*

Friend1: "Wow. What a shame..."

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jake it

To not revise at all for a test but still, by some miracle, get a good mark.

Friend: Have you revised for the test?

You: Nah, I think I'm just going to jake it.

Friend: Haha good luck then.

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jake

The worlds largest dumbass. Usually on the hockey team; Jakes are very prone to bullying other kids. They have no self respect, nor any respect for women. They tend to drive trucks, or Mustangs; obviously to compensate.

If you ever met a Jake, slap him and run for your life... Or steal their hat, they always wear hats.

Guy #1: Yo, you see that Jake over there?
Guy #2: Yeah he's a dick

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jake

A person with above average aptitude for being a tool. This person is typically aware of their own douchieness and will take great pride in their exploits. A term typically used in the prison setting.

"Dude at the yard spent like 20 minutes on the weight deck, what a fucking jake."

"C/O Hall tore my cell up today, he even took my porn, what a jake."

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