Well, I'm a writer.

Said ruefully when no one gets the joke.

No one understands that Shakespeare is just Edwardian Cinemax? Well, I'm a writer.

Well Played, Mauer

The baseball equivalent of touche.

Originating from the popular MLB commercial on Youtube where Joe Mauer gives proof of his bikini-clad trip to Cabo with the host, with a photo in a frame, after the host denies ever going.

"My hugs can cure anything!"

'Even cancer?"

'Well played, Mauer."

well, he's nice

This phrase is something a woman says when she isn't really attracted to a guy that she dated. She uses this term to cover up her inner feelings.

Jill: "Hey how did the date go?"
Sarah: "Well, he's nice."

tapping the old well

When someone hooks up with ex-girlfriend, fuck buddy or anyone else the he has previously had sex with usually out of desperation

1. Guy 1 "Looks like Blaze is tapping the old well again"

Guy 2 "LOL"

2. Guy 1 "Hey man i'm really drunk and horny, I may have to go tap an old well tonight"

Guy 2 "Shit man"

mmmmmmm might as well

a phrase used by a girl who is never satisfied.

girl: mmmmmmm might as well never come home

boy: okay i was at work

girl:mmmm i might as well dig your grave since you are never here

Schmilkers wishing well

The act surprising a recipient by peeing in their anus following anal intercourse

I got the schmilkers wishing well last night.

It sits well on a Ritz

Used to describe anything bona fide or legit like as a seal of approval.

Originated from Andy Griffith (speaking on a Ritz Cracker TV commercial):
"Mmm-mmmmh. Anything sits good on a Ritz." Supposed to mean Ritzes are so excellent.
IT SITS WELL ON A RITZ refers to being good enough for a Ritz (figuratively).
Not limited to just food.

"I sure do like King Kelly orange marmalade. IT SITS WELL ON A RITZ."
"This Humboldt Purple I gots here SITS ON A RITZ, too. Load a bowl and see for yourself."
"Oh, that's just my cuz. He OK; he SHITS ON THE RITZ."